Archive for War of the Worlds

Alien-Fearing Hicks, Upside Down Monsters, Sci-Fi Puppets

Posted in Aliens, Classic Horror, Evil, Fantasy, Misc. Horror, Science Fiction, Scream Queens, Slashers with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 11, 2017 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Brave New Jersey

Recently cleaned out the fridge and am sad to report that all my “science experiments” were epic fails. (I thought egg salad, if left in a controlled climate environment for seven months, would turn to some sort of miracle lip balm and/or car polish, thereby making me wealthy rich.)

Crossing fingers that those potatoes I stored last year in the back of a lower cupboard that hurts my back to reach will have better results, as I really, really need to be wealthy rich.

Speaking of things that could go south, here are a few upcoming horror/sci-fi and fantasy movies that make or may not stink up most of your apartment building, prompting neighbors to call the police, thinking somebody died…

BRAVE NEW JERSEY (August 4, 2017)
“In 1938, the residents of a small town in New Jersey react in various forms of panic after listening to Orson Welles’ radio broadcast rendition of H.G. Wells’ War of the Worlds.”

This one always cracks me up. People back then listening to the radio play of War of the Worlds thinkin’ it was a real alien invasion and crapping their suspendered farm pants sideways. Always loved Orson Wells’ TV interview later where he looked visibly shaken and dumbfounded that people took his radio show literally. When the cameras turned off, Wells probably went into the men’s room, sparked a fatty and laughed his ass off. As well he should have.

Stranger Things 2

STRANGER THINGS 2 (Oct. 27, 2017)
“It’s 1984 and the citizens of Hawkins, Indiana are still reeling from the horrors of the Demogorgon and the secrets of Hawkins Lab. Will Byers has been rescued from the Upside Down but a bigger, sinister entity still threatens those who survived.”

The first season of Stranger Things (2016) was a surprise mind-blower and became the left-field mega hit of the year. This means Stranger Things 2 — if they don’t screw it up — could be even bigger and should fulfill your daily recommended allowance of Demogorgons.

Ghastlies

GHASTLIES (November 11, 2017)
“Three sorority sisters plan an initiation for their nerdy friend during a weekend getaway. Things don’t go exactly as planned when they accidentally stumble upon a craft containing a trio of extraterrestrial ghastly ghouls. Armed with only their boyfriends and brains, they resolve to send these pint-sized gatecrashers back to the edge of the universe — or die trying.”

I like the “or die trying” part, though by telling us the sorority sisters are armed only with their boyfriends and brains, clearly they’re missing the bigger picture here. They have everything they need stuffed under their shirts to take down the aliens. Just ask their boyfriends.

Psychopaths

PSYCHOPATHS (2017/2018)
“Several psychopaths wreak havoc over the course of a violent evening.”

This one gets the most economic press release award of the year. Eleven words that sum up not only the movie, but last call at the Tug Inn or “tavern” (1.5 miles from where I’m currently busking for bit coins). Normally, I’d give that reference prop to The Poggie Tavern, but since they cleaned it up, it’s no longer a toxic, biological disaster dive bar. Still smells like cigarette smoke, though — from 10 years ago.

Vampires, Mummies, Robots, Teenagers

Posted in Aliens, Classic Horror, Evil, Science Fiction, Scream Queens, Vampires, Werewolves with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 1, 2016 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Underworld: Blood Wars

Some old faces, some new faces. Kinda like looking in a fun house mirror. (Man, I gotta get me one o’ those things. Then I’d be a god.)

UNDERWORLD BLOOD WARS (January 9, 2017)
Vampire death dealer Selene fends off brutal attacks from both the Lycan clan and the Vampire faction that betrayed her. With her only allies – David and his father Thomas — she must stop the eternal war between Lycans and Vampires, even if it means she has to make the ultimate sacrifice.”

Werewolves versus vampires swap spit on the battlefield one more time, although the press release hints that it’s the end of the line for the highly popular/successful Underworld franchise. Whenever I hear the words “ultimate sacrifice,” I think of that time I tried a tiny sip of wine at the urging of a friend’s wife. Barfed my guts out all over the place. Beer = cool. Wine = NOT COOL.

The Mummy

THE MUMMY (June 9, 2017)
“Thought safely entombed in a crypt deep beneath the unforgiving desert an ancient queen, whose destiny was unjustly taken from her, is awakened in our current day, bringing with her malevolence grown over millennia and terrors that defy human comprehension.”

Tom Cruise heads up this big budget re-remake. I like Tom – he rocked it in Edge of Tomorrow (2014) and Oblivion (2013), two of the better sci-fi movies in recent years. Heck, he’s even been smacking alien arse since 2005’s War of the Worlds. Tom will save us from the Mummy. I have no doubt.

#Screamers

#SCREAMERS (2017)
“When an Internet company decides to investigate a series of ‘Screamer’ videos, they are confronted with havoc and hell they could never expect.”

I’ve seen those #Screamer videos on YouTube™. Most of ‘em are just dumb teenagers doing dumb things. Sorry, I meant to say ALL teenagers are dumb.

Kill Command

KILL COMMAND (out now / VOD), December 27, 2016 / DVD)
“Set in a near future, technology-reliant society is creating killing machines. Against this backdrop an elite army unit is helicoptered in to a remote, off-the-grid island training facility, to test the capabilities of the latest prototypes. They set up positions and make short work of the AI targets in the killing field. However, overnight their sentry goes missing, and when they find the corpse the next day they find themselves in the killing field and the tables have turned. The Marines fight to survive on an island is overrun by an enemy intelligence far beyond their predecessors, which learns from their every move.”

Sounds like they borrowed a rejected script from The Terminator (1984). The tired plot of Kill Command might work better as a video game. Note to video game makers: I don’t play video games. A grand waste of time. I’d rather lay on the couch and enrich myself in the outer glow of TV’s nourishing content.

Nazi Dinosaurs

Posted in Aliens, Fantasy, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, UFOs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 11, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Iron Sky: The Coming Race

Did you see Iron Sky, the 2012 independently made Nazi UFO movie? Of course you did, how silly of me. The production values were some of the best ever seen for an indie funded movie. And while the storyline of a Nazi stronghold on the moon plotting a comeback tour after being served by our troops back in 1945 was a deliciously nice take, the main characters were a disappointing and annoying distraction. With the hopeful release of Iron Sky: The Coming Race, the filmmakers have a chance to fine-tune their game.

I say hopeful as the movie is being crowd-funded on IndieGoGo™ [click here]. As of this writing they have only rounded up $91,000 of their intended $500,000 goal and 40 days left to make dinosaurs happen. Being a patron of the arts, I pledged a generous $18.00 to the cause.

Iron Sky: The Coming Race

And what a cause it is: the extremely well-produced trailer exhibits the uncommonly high-production values first depicted in Iron Sky and shows a woman, who is in reality a shapeshifting reptilian in the Antarctic (or someplace frozen and snowy) taking an elevator down to the center of the Earth, which is hollow like a malt ball and a paradise of sorts. It’s there she greets Hitler riding a T-rex dinosaur. I might have to go back and pledge another $18.00 as this looks cooler than the snow up top.

Iron Sky: The Coming Race

Here’s the plot: “Twenty years after the events of Iron Sky, the former Nazi Moonbase has become the last refuge of mankind. Earth was devastated by a nuclear war, but buried deep under the wasteland lies a power that could save the last of humanity – or destroy it once and for all.”

“The truth behind the creation of mankind will be revealed when an old enemy leads our heroes on an adventure into the Hollow Earth. To save humanity they must fight the Vril, an ancient shapeshifting reptilian race and their army of dinosaurs.”

Iron Sky

I declare all of that to be awesome. And in case you want to get up to speed on Iron Sky, the movie is on Netflix™ and I blogged all over myself about it twice here, once in July of 2010 [click here] and again on February 10, 2012 [click here].

P.S. No I am not cheap. $18.00 is all I could afford after spending $1,200.00 on new hair product. Hey, a sci-fi fan fan has to look his best.

P.P.S. The ad poster for Iron Sky: The Coming Race liberally borrows its look from 2005’s War of the Worlds remake. Don’t let that keep you from giving generously in their time of need.

War of the Worlds