Archive for undead

Halloween Parties, Mutant Frogs, Ghost Cannibals

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Foreign Horror, Ghosts, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Slashers, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 20, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Halloween

This is kinda neato cool — A Halloween soundtrack listening party in records stores across the U.S. (or “United States”), running from October 19, 2018 (the album’s release date) through October 21, 2018. And hey, a few of the stores will be handing out free goodie bags and vinyl giveaways. This is good, because I’d hate to come back later and egg their otherwise clean storefronts.

Halloween

A select section from the press release: “John Carpenter composed the score with Cody Carpenter and Daniel Davies. The new soundtrack pays homage to the classic Halloween score that Carpenter composed and recorded in 1978.” Hope this one is embellished with stabby noises and babysitter screams.

Halloween

After you click HERE to see if you’re anywhere near one of the select record stores. (Mine’s Sonic Boom, which is about a $25 Lyft™ ride to get to. Not sure how much to come back.) And when you’re done looking in the mirror to see how sad you are when you discover these parties aren’t anywhere near you, brighten your flushed day with these upcoming horror/sci-fi movies that may or may not make you wanna jiggle the handle…

Channel Zero: The Dream Door

CHANNEL ZERO: THE DREAM DOOR (October 26, 2018/SyFy™ Channel)
“Newlyweds Jillian and Tom have brought their own secrets into their marriage. After a strange door is discovered in their basement, those secrets they kept from each other will threaten their relationship — and their lives.”

Hope this installment is better than the last two. But hey, any excuse to plank on the couch. It’s said this one is based on the creepypasta short story Hidden Door by Charlotte Bywater. I don’t eat pasta; too creepy.

Strange Nature

STRANGE NATURE (2018)
“By moving in with her estranged hermit father in the backwoods of a small town, Kim and son Brody find themselves in the middle of a horrendous phenomenon where deadly offspring mutations spread from animals to humans.”

This one features mutant frogs. I’m hopping up and down with glee, though frogs kinda already look like mutants. I hate it when you get in a staring contest with one, and just when you think you’re gonna win, the darn thing makes its eyes bulge hard and goons you out. Man, I hate that.

I Still See You

I STILL SEE YOU (2018)
“Nine years after an apocalyptic event that killed millions, left the world is left inhabited by ghosts.”

Better ghosts than zombies. Ghosts won’t eat your face, whereas zombies would start chowing down without even stopping to remove the skin wrapper first. Still, with all those ghosts left hanging around, so much for getting in a little private time in the all-purpose bathroom. let’s just hope that ghosts are unable to post on Instagram™. Embarrassing doesn’t even begin to cover it.

The Dark

THE DARK (October 22, 2018/UK)
“An undead young woman, Mina, stalks the ‘Devil’s Den’ woods where she was killed. If anyone enters the woods, she kills them and feasts on the body. But when she stumbles upon a young blind boy named Alex in the back of a car who shows signs of horrifying abuse, she can’t bring herself to kill him. As police and locals close in, searching for Alex, Mina’s growing relationship with him changes her in ways she never thought possible.”

So she’s an undead cannibal and wants to be a nanny? Wonder if she charges by the hour? Hope she doesn’t eat your neck off if you don’t tip her.

EDM Zombies

Posted in Classic Horror, Science Fiction, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 9, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Return of the Living Dead 5: Rave to the Grave

In Return of the Living Dead 5: Rave to the Grave (2005), an Ecstasy/energy drink drug is synthesized in a college lab from the deadly chemical from the preceding movie (i.e., Return of the Living Dead 4: Necropolis/2005).

Return of the Living Dead 5: Rave to the Grave

It was “discovered” in an oil drum in the attic of the uncle/secret military government dude who originally developed the nerve gas fumes, which reanimates the dead. Must’ve been hard to get the oil drum up into the attic without spilling it all over boxes of old Christmas lights, clothes that seem to shrink with every passing year and family photos that remind you how fat you’ve become.

Return of the Living Dead 5: Rave to the Grave

The easily swallowed pills turn the experimental-drug-taking “free-your-mind” students into even more mindless zombies, just in time for the big Halloween rave. Rave music sucks. It always has. Anybody who thinks it doesn’t is no doubt already brain dead, because you’d have to be to listen to that computerized noise.

Return of the Living Dead 5: Rave to the Grave

But I digress. The big party turns into a brain du jour buffet, with under-grad zombies biting and chewing on whatever is inside the heads of those being bitten, which looks like bubble gum with hair on it. There’s even a zombie rat, that turns out to be a better actor than everyone combined.

Return of the Living Dead 5: Rave to the Grave

One part comedy, one part horror, one hundred parts stupid. No wonder zombie college students want brains — they never had any to begin with.

Historical Zombies, Future Mutants, Ultimate Bully Solution

Posted in Asian Horror, Classic Horror, Evil, Foreign Horror, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 6, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

The Walking Dead

Someone, I don’t know who, has released the key art for AMC’s The Walking Dead Season 9 premier for October 7. This is bittersweet as it’s widely reported that it’s the last season for lead TWD star Andrew Lincoln (aka, Rick Grimes). The zombies couldn’t take him down, so it looks like after all these flesh-chomping years, boredom has.

The Walking Dead

From the press release: “Show-runner Angela Kang recently spoke about the season’s time jump. ‘We’ll explore what happened as man made objects and structures break down. Infrastructure like roads and bridges are changing and crumbling. And we’ll also explore what happens as resources are getting low. There’s a fun Western vibe that has emerged. We are going into a period where a lot of the things that we’ve seen in previous seasons have broken down, so they’ve got these horses and carriages that are being drawn around instead of cars. Things are lit with oil lamps. People are using different kinds of weaponry. There’s a real grittiness to it that I think will be fun and fresh for the viewers.’”

The Walking Dead

Yeah, but what about the zombies? As a “day one” fan, I’ve seen how the walking dead have been relegated to being rotting frosting on a overstuffed cake with increasingly too many ingredients. And by ingredients, I mean too many characters and internal story lines. But I’ll still watch Season 9 to see how Rick, back to wearing his Sheriff hat that his now dead son Carl wore for several seasons, hangs it up.

The Walking Dead

While we all theorize with furrowed brow, here are a few upcoming horror/sci-fi movies that you may or may not want to hang your hat on…

Sleep No More

SLEEP NO MORE (October 2, 2018)
“Five graduate students are conducting a study to prove the theory that once you’ve passed 200 hours without sleep, you will never need sleep again. As the hours tick by and their struggle to stay awake intensifies, they each start to have strange and unsettling experiences. Visions from the past, violent impulses and terrifying waking nightmares begin to take hold and turn this experiment into a desperate fight for survival.”

I could see why someone would stay awake for almost nine days when there’s so much good stuff on TV to binge watch. Then again, it’s really hard to resist the siren call of the couch ‘n blankie. For me, practically impossible.

Rampant

RAMPANT (October/2018)
Yi Chung fights against ‘Night Demons’ to save the Joseon Nation. Yi Chung is the son of the king, and the greatest martial artist in the world. Although he is given to the Qing Empire as a political hostage, he returns home when his brother, the Crown Prince Yi Young, calls him back after many years. And it’s because of the nightmarish monsters plaguing the country that Yi Chung is tasked to destroy.”

This one is said to be a South Korean “historical action zombie” movie and is already getting gleeful comparisons to the hit South Korean zombie movie, Train To Busan (2016). It also means we’ll have to watch it with sub-titles. If I wanted to read, I’d buy a coloring book.

Mutant Blast

MUTANT BLAST (2018)
“A fearless soldier and TS-347 — a man with superhuman strength — are being pursued by a military cell responsible for scientific experiments that have resulted in a zombie apocalypse. On the way, they meet Pedro, a man with few ambitions and a great hangover. Together, they will try to escape to a safe place, but complications will cross their paths in the form of a nuclear bomb.”

“A man with few ambitions and a great hangover.” I should sue for copyright infringement.

The Shed

THE SHED (2018)
“When orphaned Stan finds a murderous creature of the night has taken refuge in his backyard tool shed — and killed his grandfather— he can’t go to the cops who’ll likely put him in foster care. Stan tries to battle the demon alone, while Dommer, Stan’s best friend, thinks it’s the solution to their bully problems, if only they can lure the bullies to the Shed. Sometimes monsters turn regular folks into heroes, and sometimes they just turn them into different monsters.”

Resourceful, but not the best way to clear your path of bullies. Start with a Super Soaker™ loaded with asparagus pee and watch ‘em fall like Republicans.

Meh-galodon, LOL Zombies, The Swimming Dead

Posted in Asian Horror, Asian Sci-Fi, Foreign Horror, Giant Monsters, Godzilla, Nature Gone Wild, Scream Queens, Sharks, UFOs, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 25, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

The Meg

So everyone waits for months to see the giant shark movie, The Meg (2018), and in some theaters in 3D. Was it good? Yes and no. (Put the cost to see it in the “no” column.) First, the shark looked pretty realistic and quite “shark-y.” The acting/action was tight, as was the dialogue.

The Meg

So where’s the beef? The filmmakers blew several chances to have the Megalodon really chew up the scenery, if you catch my incoming tide. That whole scene where there are thousands of people on inner tubes in the water should have been a blood bath, with the Meg straining bodies through its mega-mouth like krill. In all, a fail not to show more chewing-with-your-mouth-open and blood-gushing scenes for a shark movie.

The Meg

As neato as the shark looked, the concept art made the swimming mouth look tons more britches-staining. So much so, if I was out on an inner tube drinking a beer and saw this thing in the water, I’d pollute the water. Then the water would be polluted and hopefully scare the shark away. At least, that’s what I’m betting my inner tubes on.

The Meg

So here are a few upcoming horror/sci-fi movies that may or may not get you banned from community swimming pools. (Still waiting for my appeal to be heard)…

Beyond The Sky

BEYOND THE SKY (September 21, 2018/VOD/Limited)
“A man has a powerful and traumatic connection to alien abductions since his early childhood. He sets out to disprove the alien abduction phenomenon by attending a UFO convention — but then meets someone, who claims to have been abducted every seven years on her birthday, he realizes there may be more to these claims than meets the eye.”

Too bad she wasn’t born on February 29, a leap year, so she could minimize the probing. I’m also thinkin’ that if the guy is out to disprove alien abductions, then why was he so traumatized by it? As my proctologist says, why not go for the ride?

Possum

POSSUM (2018)
“A disgraced children’s puppeteer returns to his childhood home and is forced to confront his wicked stepfather and the secrets that have tortured him his entire life.”

I bet the stepfather caught the budding entertainer working on his lucrative career with his pant puppet. And as we all know, practice makes perfect.

One Cut of the Dead

ONE CUT OF THE DEAD (2018)
“An epic, 37-minute opening single take makes Shin’ichirô Ueda’s feature debut a bright, breezy and laugh-out-loud hilarious zombie comedy. A film crew is shooting a zombie horror flick in an abandoned water filtration plant, allegedly used for human experiments by the military. Just as the director browbeats his actors and demands more special effects blood, a real zombie apocalypse erupts, much to his auteur delight. Packed with meta-movie references as mocking as they are loving, this relentless takedown of the Living Dead genre is a total blast.”

This one came out in November 4, 2017 in Japan, where Godzilla’s day job is in deconstruction (heh). It’s also been raking in a ton of giddy reviews, so when it comes to the States, I’ll have to giddyup and go rent it.

Aurora

AURORA (2018)
“The passenger ship Aurora collides into a rocky shore, destroying the livelihood of an entire island — forcing Leana, the owner of a rundown inn, to work for the victim’s families by finding the missing bodies for a bounty; risking her sister’s life and her own from the dead that will come to shore and find shelter in their home.”

Crud-a-rama — the trailer, which admittedly looks kinda spooktacular, is in sub-titles. I have a hard enough time trying to read the ingredients on a can of Budweiser™. Why can’t they just put “Contents: Beer” and just leave well enough alone? P.S. I didn’t know zombies could swim. Is there the undead can’t do?

Rock Horror Lottery, Time-Traveling Sharks,Trained Zombies

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Foreign Horror, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Sharks, Slashers, TV Vixens, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 12, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Alice Cooper Lottery

As first reported by Bloody-Disgusting.com, horror shock rock icon Alice Cooper is now featured on scratch-to-win Lottery™ tickets in his home state of Arizona. (Probably where he gets his stage snakes. I hear you can practically trip over ’em in Arizona.)

Billion Dollar Babies

The measure of success used to be to get your face on a postal stamp. But being on a Lotto scratch card seems a more appropriate way to honor the rock star who had a hit album called Billion Dollar Babies back in 1973 (way to tie-in, Arizona!), and paved the road for others like Rob Zombie and Marilyn Manson by pioneering the theater use of said (live) pythons, dead babies (song title and plastic prop), an onstage guillotine execution, a hangman’s noose, a ride on an electric chair, and tons of horror imagery and zombie stuff.

Alice Cooper

The Alice Cooper Lotto tickets went live in Arizona on August 7, 2018 and will continue to be purchasable through Halloween, 2018. From the press release: “There are six top prizes of $50,000 each, with second-chance prizes that range from Alice Cooper memorabilia to VIP tickets and pre-show party access to the legendary rocker’s annual Christmas Pudding concert.” (Note: The album came with a “billion dollar” bill in the packaging. Been trying to spend it every since. Guess I’ll have to buy more than one microwaved hot dog as it appears 7-Eleven™ just doesn’t appear to have enough correct change.)

Billion Dollar Babies

While we all wait for our turn to have our printed faces scratched off with the edge of a quarter (a penny works, too), here are a few upcoming horror/sci-fi movies that you may or may not want to scratch off your viewing list…

The Last Sharknado: It's About Time

THE LAST SHARKNADO: IT’S ABOUT TIME (August 19, 2018/SyFy™ Channel)
In the sixth and final installment of the series, Fin will travel back in time in a Sharknado-turned-time-machine to resurrect his family by stopping the first sharknado that started it all. In his quest, Fin will fight dinosaurs, knights, cowboys, and, of course, sharks. This time, it’s not a question of how to stop the sharknados — it’s when!”

Gotta give ‘em props for the movie title, as it perfectly sums up the thankful END of one of the most overplayed (and dumb) horror movie franchises of all time. And this coming from a guy who loves shark movies. Looks like they’re gonna go out with style, what with time-travel, dinosaurs, knights, cowboys (just repeating the press release here) and, of course, sharks that fall from the sky like faulty airplanes. Good for them. Now go away.

Lizzie

LIZZIE (September 14, 2018)
Chloë Sevigny stars as Lizzie Borden, the notorious woman at the heart of one of the most enduring mysteries in American history. After a lifetime of loneliness, Lizzie finds a kindred spirit in housemaid Bridget Sullivan (Kristen Stewart) and their secret intimacy sparks an unthinkable act. The movie explores the days leading up to the savage crimes in a dark tale of repression, exploitation and thwarted dreams.”

Lizzie

Back in the good ‘ol days of 1892, Lizzie Borden, the spinster daughter of Andrew Jackson Borden and Sarah Anthony Borden (what are the odds they both have the same last name?), was infamously charged with axe-to-the-head-multiple-times on said husband and wife double murder. Lizzie was arrested as a prime suspect, but later deemed innocent by the court and let go, presumably to open an axe store (poor timing, but good prices from what I hear).

Lizzie Borden

This grisly, unsolved murder led to more than a few movie treatments and remakes over the years. But Lizzie — a women’s spin on the subject — brings a whole new perspective, implying that Lizzie had a girlfriend and they both plotted — and executed (sorry) — the de-parenting. For another interesting look at Lizzie Borden, the Jason Voorhees of the late 1800s, check out Lizzie Borden Took An Axe (2014) with Christina Ricci as the chilling and non-emotional portrayal of the world’s first hacker. Personally, I though it was the mailman who performed the crime, based on absolutely no proof whatsoever. I just trust my gut stuff.

Redcon-1

REDCON-1 (September 28, 2018/UK)
“After a zombie apocalypse spreads from a London prison, the UK is brought to its knees. The spread of the virus is temporarily contained but, without a cure, it’s only a matter of time before it breaks its boundaries and the biggest problem of all…any zombies with combat skills are now enhanced. With the South East of England quarantined from the rest of the world using fortified borders, intelligence finds that the scientist responsible for the outbreak is alive and well in London. With his recovery being the only hope of a cure, a squad of eight Special Forces soldiers is sent on a suicide mission to the city, now ruled by the undead, with a single task: get him out alive within 72 hours by any means necessary. What emerges is an unlikely pairing on a course to save humanity against ever-rising odds.”

So the dead come back to life with all their previous life skills. I guess when it’s my turn to go to the great couch in the sky, I’ll come back LOADED (heh) with years of accrued beer drinking abilities. The world as you know it won’t stand a chance. Sucks to be everybody but me.

Slaughterhouse Rulez

SLAUGHTERHOUSE RULEZ (October 31, 2018/UK | 2018/2019 US)
Slaughterhouse is an elite boarding school where boys and girls are groomed for power and greatness and they’re about to meet their match. Don Wallace, is a wide-eyed new boy from a modest background forced to navigate a baffling new world of arcane rules and rituals, presided by sadistic sixth formers. Matters of status are aggressively enforced and conversation with school goddess Clemsie, are strictly forbidden. But this ancient and ordered world is about to be shaken to its foundations — literally — when a controversial frack site on prize school woodland causes seismic tremors, a mysterious sinkhole and an unspeakable horror is unleashed. Soon a new pecking order will be established as pupils, teachers and the school matron become locked in a bloody battle for survival.”

Holy frack — an unspeakable horror comes out of a resulting sinkhole? I bet the quakes busted the boarding school’s sewer line. P.S. Resist the urge to compare this one with this same-named 2004 short, The Slaughter House Rules. That one was only 13 minutes long and from what I hear, did not feature a busted sewer line spewing liquefied leavings all over everyone’s faces and/or clean shirts. That’d be really icky if they did.

Mystery Godzilla, Occult Virgins, Pet Dinosaurs

Posted in Aliens, Asian Horror, Asian Sci-Fi, Classic Horror, Evil, Foreign Horror, Ghosts, Giant Monsters, Godzilla, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, UFOs, Witches, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 15, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Funko Godzilla

Funko, fast becoming my favorite pop icon toy company, just released a Godzilla “mystery” box. Also called “mystery minis”, you get to see two Godzilla toy figures — regular and flaming (as in “on fire”), and one that’s not visible. Kinda neat. It’s like opening a peanut shell and wondering if you’ll get one of those allergy-triggering legumes (a peanut is part of the bean family), or some sort of invasive larvae that’ll grow to the size of your arm and eat the peanut butter sandwich that’s hanging from the end of it.

Godzilla Earth

We already know there’s a bunch of different Godzillas: MechaGodzilla, Space Godzilla, JesusZilla (actually, he’s just the son), and those river-dancing all over what’s left of humanity in Godzilla: Planet of the Monsters (2017): Godzilla Filius and the 300 meter-embiggened, Godzilla Earth. I don’t think Godzilla Earth could fit in even God’s toy box, so I’m thinkin’’ the mystery ‘monster‘ is Ghost Godzilla. Don’t know if he even exists, just though it sounded cool.

Funko Godzilla

While you click away from this blog to go check out Funko.com (yes, you WILL be blown away), here are a few upcoming horror/sci-fi movies may or may not seem as cool as…Ghost Godzilla

The Night of the Virgin

THE NIGHT OF THE VIRGIN (June 12, 2018)
Javier Badola is a lonely young man who attends a New Years Eve party with the intention of losing his virginity. After midnight he finds himself alone and rejected until a middle-aged woman invites him back to her apartment. What promises to be an epic sexual debut turns into his worst nightmare when he discovers that the woman has a perverse occult agenda.”

Seriously? What guy doesn’t go out with the intent of losing his virginity — or at least re-imagineering it? And just so we’re clear, it just. ..doesn’t…matter if the woman has a perverse occult agenda. It’s super fun happy times for your swimsuit area, man! And if there are any “virgins” out there reading this, I’ll give you some advice via an old joke: “Sex is a lot like air — it’s no big deal until you’re not getting any.”

Canaries

CANARIES (2018)
“In the style of Shaun Of The Dead, The Lost Boys and Attack the Block, Canaries is a funny, dark and action packed sci-fi horror comedy that pits a group of drunken friends on New Years Eve in a Welsh valley against an invasion task force of creepy time-traveling aliens. A kick-ass M.O.D agent, an insecure radio DJ and a kung fu master who owns the local B&B learn their new years resolution this year is simple: STAY ALIVE.”

Why do I have a sudden desire to move to a Welsh valley? I hear the residents are out of this world. P.S. I wanna be a kung fu master, but don’t wanna own a B&B. The things people do all over sheets — there’s the real horror story.

Zombiepura

ZOMBIEPURA (2018)
“When a mysterious virus breaks out in an isolated army camp, a lazy reservist soldier and his tough commander must work together to survive, and learn what it means to be real soldiers.”

Wow, it’s like they don’t even try and come up with a new spin on zombies. Sounds like Gomer Pyle versus the Undead.

The Adventures of Jurassic Pet: Chapter 1

ADVENTURES OF A JURASSIC PET: CHAPTER 1 (2018)
“An adventurous teenager summons the courage to help a friendly dinosaur to escape from the clutches of a mad scientist that wants to use him for experimentations.”

I imagine the worst part about a pet dinosaur is cleaning the litter box.

Vinyl Horror, Mix ’n Match Predators, Slaves To Evil

Posted in Asian Horror, Classic Horror, Evil, Foreign Horror, Ghosts, Science Fiction, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 3, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Mystery Minis

If you have some loose bus change totaling $169.99 jingling around in your britches, you may want to click on over to HouseofMysteriousSecrets.com to pre-order their case set of miniature vinyl horror movie icons to put on various shelves and/or tabletops in the place you change (and hopefully wash) said britches.

Mystery Minis

Each of these cooler than heck collectibles is 3 1/4” tall and are bendable into different poses. For instance, the possessed Regan doll (The Exorcist/1973) could be bent over to reenact projective vomiting. Other characters include multiple versions of Freddy Krueger, Jason Voorhees, and Pennywise (1990 version). These dolls can be purchased separately, but why? Pre-order all of ‘em now as they’re arriving July, 2018. 

And while you’re clearing your shelves of unread books/plastic bowling trophies to make room for ‘em, here are a few upcoming horror/sci-fi movies that may or may not be collectible…

Pred4tor

PRED4TOR (2018)
“From the outer reaches of space to the small-town streets of suburbia, the hunt comes home in Shane Black’s explosive reinvention of the Predator series. Now, the universe’s most lethal hunters are stronger, smarter and deadlier than ever before, having genetically upgraded themselves with DNA from other species. When a young boy accidentally triggers their return to Earth, only a ragtag crew of ex-soldiers and a disgruntled science teacher can prevent the end of the human race.”

Already e-blogged about this prior, though I can’t recall when as I’ve been distracted by…pizza. So this is the latest key art and official plot — Predators swapping DNA spit in the shower with other species. You have my attention. Note to Predators: If it doesn’t involve probing or the touching of the swimsuit area, I would like to be genetically-upgraded so that I, too, may join your social club.

The Dark

THE DARK (2018)
Undead and hating it, young flesh-eater Mina haunts the woods surrounding her childhood home. When she befriends a physically abused boy, she must figure out why, for once, she isn’t feeling homicidal.”

Interesting spin on the zombie theme. I bet Mina eats the abused boy’s parents. And I hope she burps/farts as loud as the horns of humanity after finishing her meal. Parents or others who abuse kids should get even worse punishment than being digested and crapped out by a zombie.

Threshold

THRESHOLD (2018)
“A group of graduating college seniors find themselves stuck in the spooky residence of the college President after a graduation party. The house changes as they move through it, no passage leading the same way twice. They soon discover the house is a labyrinth, and at its center is an ancient monster of mythology. As they are eaten one by one, they learn they are part of a ritual and must find their way out of the house by solving the maze if they are going to survive.”

It’s said that Threshold’s monster is a Minotaur, a creature half man, half bull. So does he sleep in a bed or a barn? I bet he’d be king of the rodeo at those county fair bull-riding contests.

Satan's Slaves

SATAN’S SLAVES (2017/Indonesia – 2018/US)
“A record-breaking box-office hit upon release, Joko Anwar’s affectionate remake of 1980’s Pengabdi Setan is one of horror cinema’s recent triumphs: an atmospheric, expertly-shot roller-coaster ride of a haunted house film, inspired as much by Indonesian folklore as by retro genre classics.”

Slashfilm.com has this to say about that: “A Quiet Place and Hereditary have already been dubbed 2018’s scariest films to beat, but you can add Satan’s Slaves to that list now – the most horrifying film of 2018 you haven’t heard of yet.” With that kind of endorsement, it kinda makes your mouth start slobbering all on its own. Better wear a plastic shirt (and possibly pants) when I go see it. Heck, might as well buy a wet suit.