Archive for Tron

Desert UFOs

Posted in Aliens, Bigfoot, Science Fiction, UFOs with tags , , , , , , , , , , on November 7, 2016 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

The Objective

Did a capsule review of The Objective (2008) back in the waning hours of 2011. And because you’ve been biting your nails in anticipation for a comprehensive throw down every since, I give to you the full meal deal…

The Objective

A CIA operative (I don’t know what that is) leads six elite special forces military guys into the Afghanistan desert to hunt and shoot terrorists. There’s a whole lotta nothing out there: a few rocks, some dirt, a bunch of bugs, a UFO

The Objective

The CIA guy uses hi-tech heat-sensing equipment to film anomalies (lights, shapes, triangles that look like the Master Control Program in Tron/1982), and beaming the images back via satellite uplink. A peek through the infrared camera shows humanoid shapes walking into a triangle. The naked eye, however, sees nothing. Freakin’ freaky.

The Objective

Nervous nerves getting frayed to the point of insubordination, the CIA agent explains they’ve known about the “visitors” for years, and that their mission wasn’t to seek out terrorists and shoot them in the belief system, but to gather more information and see if we could borrow their other-world technology to, like, conquer this world.

The Objective

Interesting concept, but the weak pay off makes me think that maybe we aren’t being visited by aliens after all, and that I’ve just been wasting my time thinking so. I’m gonna shift my theories back over to Bigfoot. He won’t let me down.

L.A. Mummies

Posted in Evil, Ghosts, Scream Queens, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 4, 2016 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Legion of the Dead

Someone needs a geography lesson. In Legion of the Dead (2005) an ancient Egyptian burial chamber is discovered in the hills just outside of L.A. In it lies the interred mummy of the Queen of Hollywood Egyptians.

Legion of the Dead

While studying the sarcophagus, bumbling students accidentally bring the Queen back to life. She awakens with freshly-polished nails, styled hair and no clothes. She can be forgiven for this as she has no problem with walking around naked.

Legion of the Dead

She needs a virgin’s blood to sacrifice with an Ankh (a sharp piece of wood that looks like Prince’s guitar) so that she can reanimate a legion of the mummified undead. A cop shows up and shoots one of the mummies and it explodes in a flurry of dust, like when a full vacuum cleaner bag busts open.

Legion of the Dead

This cop, it should be noted, is Bruce Boxleitner, who played that guy in Tron (1982). Bruce — what the hell happened? You don’t need this. You were in Tron, man! This gagger needs to be re-buried back in the Egyptian district of Los Angeles.