Archive for The Fly

Happy Alien Day, Dinosaurs vs. Criminals, Rock Mom

Posted in Aliens, Classic Horror, Evil, Giant Monsters, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Scream Queens, TV Vixens, UFOs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 26, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Alien Day

Today (Thursday, April 26, 2018) is Alien Day. And yes, it’s a globally recognized religious holiday. Traditional gifts include blurry photographs, night trips to Uranus, watches that stop for hours at a time and unearthly implants.

HR Giger Museum Bar

I’m sure you have a lot of themed activities planned, like going to the YMCA and getting probed in the locker room, inviting fellow abductees over to watch E.T. the Extraterrestrial (1982) and LOLing at that turd-shaped toilet plunger alien, or even stopping by the Museum HR Giger Bar in Château St. Germain, Gruyères, Switzerland (fashioned in part to honor of the late Giger’s Alien concept art) to slug down a few Romulan Ales while trying to score with “female” lifeforms.

Area 51

I’m headed for Area 51 and taking a few UFOs out for a test spin. It’s important to test drive a few before laying down the big bucks. FYI: Keep the extras like GPS but lose the LoJack™ — the government’s gonna steal it anyway, so why bleed the weasel?

E.T. the Extraterrestrial

Don’t forget to “phone home” if you party a little too much with your space brothers. Here are  few upcoming horror/sci-fi movies to help you forget tomorrow exactly what happened on your Uranus. (Don’t worry; it’ll all come back to vividly haunt you on Facebook™)…

The Jurassic Games

THE JURASSIC GAMES (June 12, 2018/VOD | July 3, 2018/DVD)
“The film imagines a world set in the near future wherein ten Death Row convicts are chosen to compete in The Jurassic Games, the ultimate virtual reality game show that pits its players against dinosaurs and each other. However, there is a catch; if you die in the virtual game, you also die in reality. As the devious Host continues adding improbable challenges, the characters will find the odds stacked against them as only one victor can emerge as winner and reclaim their freedom.”

The TRUE Hunger Games — heh. So criminals versus dinosaurs. My money’s on the dinosaurs. 

Venom

VENOM (October 5 (2018)
“One of Marvel’s most enigmatic, complex and badass characters comes to the big screen, starring Academy Award nominated actor Tom Hardy as the lethal protector, Venom.”

Venom

Glad they re-serviced the key art. The first one looked like Mothman horked up a Rorschach test.

Embryo

EMBRYO (2018)
Kevin and his girlfriend Evelyn, while camping out in the woods in the Chile countryside, are abducted and Evelyn is impregnated by otherworldly beings. As the entity inside her begins to grow at a rapid rate, Evelyn discovers that the cravings she’s experiencing can only be satiated by the taste of human flesh and blood. When she attacks a doctor, Kevin decides not to hand her over to the authorities, but to go on the run and try to get to big city where they can find help to remove the thing that’s slowly taking over Evelyn’s body.”

Creature feature unsafe sex knocker-uppers aren’t new. A few off the top of the ‘ol untouched condom display rack: The Mole People (1956), Day the World Ended (1956), The Alligator People (1959), Alien (1979), Humanoids From The Deep (1980), The Beast Within (1982), Inseminoid (1981), The Fly (1986), The Terror Within (1989)… I could go on for another nine months. Then there’s the reverse impregnation sci-fi romance tale that is Species (1995). Unfortunately, for you, there is no such thing as a “movie after” pill.

Hollow Body

HOLLOW BODY (2018)
“A struggling rock band led by Jimmy Kleen makes a deal with Rick Roland, a shady record executive. Things take a dark turn when the band’s lead singer Rachel Swann and her controlling stage mother, are struck by lightning and killed. Rachel comes back to life, now possessed by the spirit of her dead mother and with strange electrical powers she can’t control. Both personalities struggle for dominance of her body while the band begins to take off. Rachel’s bandmate discovers the dark secret behind the band’s success: Rachel is using her electrical powers to kill men and drain them of their electricity, transmuting it into electrifying performances. He and Jimmy must decide if they will stop her or if the high cost of success is a price they are willing to pay.”

Sounds like Shocker (1989) with guitars. For another struck-by-lighting-and-becomes-electricity “accidents”, look no further than Supergirl’s not-BFF, Livewire on the hit CW hit TV series. Say what you will about her being bonkers and able to throw electricity around like parade candy, she could re-charge your cell phone in, like, one second. That’s pretty neat.

Bloody Good Horror

Posted in Science Fiction with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 7, 2015 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Strange Blood

First look at Strange Blood’s ad poster reminds one of 2013’s Contracted, a stand-out horror indie that dealt with the theme of something super icky gone wrong with your fluids that makes your eyes bloodshot-y, your mouth lips all gunked up and unsmoochable and your face highly unattractive to stare at.

Contracted

Where the unlucky gal in Contracted acquired her disease through sexual intimacy (i.e., unprotected one night stand), the gent’s infected hemoglobin in Strange Blood is mutated by a super icky parasite that turns him into something even ickier. (Man, that word is almost universal.)

Here’s all about Strange Blood’s ickiness: “When a brilliant but obsessive scientist goes to extremes to develop a universal cure for all disease, he finds himself infected with a bizarre parasite that begins to transform him into a bloodthirsty madman. Time running out, and with the aid of his med student assistant, he must find a way to stop the monster that is growing within and prevent the rest of the world from being ‘cured.’”

Strange Blood

While the term “bloodthirsty madman” hardly makes anyone blink in these jaded times, it still applies, but only as syllables. The infected scientist takes it to the extreme and, like the mutating guys in The Fly (1958, 1986) before him, can pretty much forget about dating anything swimming in his former gene pool.

Strange Blood arrives on VOD April 28, 2015 and later on DVD June 2, 2015, hopefully in a hygenically-sealed wrapper.

Super Fly

Posted in Classic Horror, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction with tags , , , , , , , , on May 28, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

The Fly

As remakes go, 1986’s re-imagineering of The Fly (the original came out in 1958) ranks as one of sci-fi’s all time best. And not just because I said so. Ask the internet.

The Fly

Seth Brundle, scientist, invents a teleportation pod that can zap objects from one place to the other, just like the Transporter™ in Star Trek, but with more steam and wires.

The Fly

His first attempt to transport a baboon leaves him with a big inside-out monkey mess to clean up. His new girlfriend, who teaches him the ways of the flesh, inspires him to reprogram the machine to successfully deliver a biological life-form from the living room into, say, the kitchen for some celebratory snacks.

The Fly

Seth transports himself at the same time a housefly decides to give its wings a rest inside the mix master machine. The result is a sticky man-fly creature that is one of contemporary horror/sci-fi’s greatest experiments-gone-oops.

The Fly

Seth’s slow, exquisite, flesh-dripping transformation into a six-foot fly is something you’ll want to try yourself. In fact, I’m doing it as we speak. So from this point on refer to me as Super Fly.