Archive for teen wolf

Supernatural Beer, Carnival Chaos, Zombies vs. Teens

Posted in Classic Horror, demons, Evil, Misc. Horror, paranormal, Science Fiction, Slashers, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 25, 2022 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

There’s a House of Mystery comic. There’s a House of Secrets comic. But did you know there’s a House of Mysterious Secrets website, that not only sells comics, but a plethora of horror-themed memorabilia, from shirts, lunch boxes and pot holders, to bottle openers, paint sets and air fresheners? Hell yep, there is.

Mind you, this is only a paragraphed summation. When you go to houseofmysterioussecrets.com website, you’ll find a veritable Wonderland of everyday items emboldened with everything from A Nightmare on Elm Street, Godzilla, Hellraiser, Universal Monsters, Elvira, Jaws, Evil Dead, Halloween and Chucky. And even that’s just scratching the itchy surface. 

On the gift list for MYSELF is An American Werewolf in London lunch box (packed with shredded British bologna sandwiches), a Teen Wolf action figure (kinda like looking at myself), the Beetlejuice Sandworm Metal Bottle Opener (to crack a bottle of Budweiser™ Juice with it), a Nosferatu Commerative Medallion Coin (to trade for more Budweiser™ Juice), a Frankenhooker wall tapestry (made of Spank Bank material), and a Return of the Living Dead air freshener, because, hey, flesh isn’t very pleasant to sniff, let along snack on.

While you spend ALL your holiday cash on all the above, here’s a few upcoming horror/sci-fi movies that may or may not be as cool as a Jaws vaccine card holder

THE BLACKLIGHT / Out now (VOD)

“Despite trying to leave behind a life of crime, Danny reluctantly teams with naïve rich kid Liam and wildcard drug dealer Kit Viper for a robbery that leaves them in possession of a mysterious supernatural artifact with immense power.”

A supernatural artifact with immense power. Sounds like they stole a 40 oz. bottle of Steel Reserve™.

THE CHAMBER OF TERROR / December 1, 2022 (VOD)

“Nash Caruthers is on a deadly collision course with the people that tore his world apart…along with something unexpected. Something far more sinister.”

The “Chamber of Terror” in this movie is a dilapidated carnival attraction. So where do I buy a ticket to ride it? Better yet, I’ll just get a Dizzy Pass™ and make fun happen.

NIGHT OF THE COMET / December 1, 2022 (Shudder™)

A huge comet passes near the Earth, nearly vaporizing the whole planet. Only a few teenagers, who were inside a steel movie projection booth, survive — all those outside were turned to dust. But a few partially exposed people are now hideous bloodthirsty zombies — and they begin a deadly hunt for the last remaining humans.”

Only teenagers survive. I feel sorry for the zombies.

FEAR / January 27, 2023 (Theaters)

“A group of friends gather for a much-needed weekend getaway at a remote and historic hotel. Celebration turns into terror as one by one, each guest faces their own worst fear.”

The guests at a fancy pants hotel faces their worst fears. What could that be — no room service? No minibar in their executive suite? No mint on their Pacific Coast Hotel TRIA Down & Feather Pillows™? Life must be a living Hell for them.

Aliens and Werewolves

Posted in Bigfoot, Classic Horror, Evil, Science Fiction, UFOs, Werewolves with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 16, 2015 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Area 51

Some new horror offerings, in case your daily recommended allowance of horror has not been met by watching the evening news.

First up is Area 51, in production since 2009 and just now hitting VOD and is YET ANOTHER one of those flippin’ annoying hand-held camera jobs. In this Area 51 (not to be confused with 2011’s Area 51 Confidential), as a class project several conspiracy theorists break into the legendary military base out in the Nevada desert said to house a junk yard of broken down UFOs and even an alien body or two. Or six.

Here’s the official rundown: “In 2009, three friends travel to the infamous Area 51 in order to uncover its secrets. They infiltrate the base using freon filled body suits in order to mask their body temperature. Once inside, the group discovers incredible technologies before finding themselves running for their lives from an unknown force.”

The “unknown force” probably has more to do with farting inside their body suits and not being able to escape the ensuing terror. AVClub.com’s review, though, says it all about Area 51: “A few fun and creepy effects shots, nothing that happens here couldn’t be surmised from simply reading the film’s title. What we really get is a complete failure of imagination.” Ouch.

Uncaged

If probing for government secrets or being probed by aliens isn’t your cup of beer, then you might be up for Uncaged (2015), a new werewolf movie that mixes found footage with trad-style filming.

Plot: “After several nights of waking up in the woods, a troubled teen straps a camera to himself to document how he’s getting there, only to find some things are better left a mystery.”

So a teen wolf doing selfies. I’m intrigued, though a werewolf running around with a GoPro™ strapped to his fuzzy head seems highly improbable. With all that wolfing around, you’d think the camera would fall off.

“Something’s lookin’ for food – and it found us…” Great line in Dark Was The Night, arriving in theaters on July 24, 2015. An ancient curse, a small town out in the trees, and stat worthy body counts.

Dark Was The Night

Synopsis: “Maiden Woods is a remote and quiet town of decent, hard-working people, but something stirs in the dark woods surrounding this isolated community. After a logging company decimates an area of the forest, a rash of increasingly violent and unexplainable events transpires. Sheriff Paul Shields and his deputy struggle to confront their own personal demons while facing down a new breed of raw terror that is possibly older than humanity itself…and much hungrier.”

Is the monster a werewolf? Bigfoot? A hillbilly with abundant facial hair? Probably all three. Better be if they want my movie coupons.