Archive for Stalking Hand: A Scary Movie

A Handful of Bad Horror

Posted in Misc. Horror, Scream Queens with tags , , , , , on June 14, 2017 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Stalking Hand: A Scary Movie

It wasn’t the rummage sale special effects, under cooked attempts at humor or the excruciatingly slow pace of Stalking Hand: A Scary Movie (2006) that made me so upset. It was one of the lead actor chicks PRETENDING to drink a Budweiser™.

Stalking Hand: A Scary Movie

Every bottle she “swilled” from was friggin’ EMPTY. I felt like someone punched me in the stomach. Why would someone go to all the trouble of pretending to drink make-believe beer? It would’ve been better for everyone to have had a few under the belt as this intentionally humorous spoof is as flat as an Amstel Light™.

Stalking Hand: A Scary Movie

Fortunately, the virginal daughter of a minister whose top gets ripped off and her bra-less chestral area exposed is not flat. (Note: the titular severed hand that keeps popping up is sometimes a severed arm. So much for continuity OR believability.)

I think the producers were going for cheap laughs, but it was probably more funny to the crew. However, there is NOTHING funny about not drinking beer.