Archive for Roach Motel

Zombie Ghost Kids

Posted in Evil, Ghosts, Misc. Horror, TV Vixens, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , on September 14, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Wicked Little Things

After her husband dies, a hot young mom, her equally attractive 16-year-old daughter and 9-year-old little sister pack up and head deep into the Pennsylvania mountains where they’ve inherited the family house. It’s more like a rat shack, though, with none of the amenities hot chicks need, like a slow-motion shower.

Wicked Little Things

The littlest sibling hears children’s voices in the dark woods surrounding their four-story Roach Motel™ and wanders off. She discovers a mine shaft opening. This was the site of a tragic tragedy 90 years earlier in which 15 kids died while working in the coal mines. These minors were miners. Heh.

Wicked Little Things

Those same kids, now ghosts, come back every night for redemption and food. Not necessarily in that order. They have black eyes, zombie faces, and carry axes and picks and shovels. And not one of them had a Nintendo DS™.

Wicked Little Things

A local crazy guy who lives in an equally lavish dump nearby, drains his own blood into jars and goes around painting doors to keep the zombie kid ghosts out. Meanwhile, the youngest daughter has befriended one of the ghosts and are now BGFF.

Wicked Little Things

The mom discovers old photo albums and newspaper clippings in the spider web-y basement and starts to piece together the disaster that happened all those happy years ago and finds out she’s a descendant. Another descendant: the arrogant land owner who’s getting ready to evict everyone so he can turn the mountain into a ski resort (ghosts get half-off ski lift tickets).

Wicked Little Things

The local crazy guy ties up one of his pigs outside the land owner’s house, and the zombie kids play whack-a-mole with it. Then they eat it as though it were wet beef jerky. No flinching on gore, violence or swear words. Rent a pig and watch Wicked Little Things (2006) — you’ll both walk away having learned a few life lessons.

Dream Guardian

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Slashers, TV Vixens with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 20, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: Dream Master

In A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: Dream Master (1988), several survivors of supernatural killer Freddy Krueger’s last death rodeo got out of Westin Hills Hospital and are attending high school like normal teens with severe social issues.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: Dream Master

Kristen, one of the made-it-out-alive’rs, is starting to have bad dreams again, starring the Frank Sinatra of Slash. Freddy’s back to sever ties with his former friends, and pops up after a dog pees on his buried bones. There’s a joke in there somewhere.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: Dream Master

Sir Krueger later makes the rounds via a naked chick inside a possessed waterbed (you’d think that’d be dumb, but it actually isn’t) and a Roach Motel™ (one of the funnier sequences).

A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: Dream Master

Kristen is the last child of Elm Street — and Freddy, gorging on gleeful killings, needs her to find more kids for him to kill. Hey, a job is a job in this economy. Kristen invokes her New Age friend Alice by screaming (yeah, made sense to me, too), and now Alice, using the previously invoked Dream Master spell, takes Freddy down (yeah, made sense to me, too).

A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: Dream Master

Turns out Alice is the Guardian of Good Dreams (gimme a break) and is the ONLY ONE who can release the tortured souls of Freddy’s victims. Either I got lost in the middle of this mess, or the movie writers did. At least Freddy was fun to watch dispatch teenagers. It’s always nice to see someone enjoy what they do for a living.