Archive for Pig Hunt

Boar Gore

Posted in Classic Horror, Giant Monsters, Nature Gone Wild with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 4, 2015 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Boar

You know how when you’re sitting in a bar having an excessive amount of refreshing adult beverages and talking to the hobo next to you, and the topic inevitably turns to giant razorbacks rampaging around the Australian Outback and eating people? Order another drink because a movie is being made with that same subject matter.

Boar

Boar, releasing in 2016, is the bloody and violent (i.e., heartwarming) story of a monstrous razorback with jagged tusks eating people. Yeah, it’s been done many times before (Razorback/1984, Pig Hunt/2008, Chaw/2009, Prey/2010, Hogzilla/2014), but infrequent enough to warrant another romp and chomp.

Boar

Here’s what will boar us: “In the harsh, yet beautiful Australian outback lives a beast, an animal of staggering size, with a ruthless, driving need for blood and destruction. It cares for none, defends its territory with brutal force, and kills with a raw, animalistic savagery unlike any have seen before. Believed nothing more than a myth, a legend brought to life by a drunken local, the beast ventures closer to civilization, closer to life, and ultimately, closer to death. It’s brutal, it’s bloodthirsty, it’s boar.”

Boar

What makes giant hog horror movies so compelling is the creatures really exist, with some weighing in excess of 1,000 pounds. That’s a lot of breakfast makin’s. Best to stay away from these ferocious beasts and let drunk redneck hunters with machine guns put ’em on the plate for us.

Bacon That Eats YOU

Posted in Giant Monsters, Nature Gone Wild, Scream Queens with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 12, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Pig Hunt

Pig Hunt (2008) is 140 minutes long. The promised 3,000 lb. marauding boar with pink eye doesn’t make an appearance until the 131 minutes in. So what the heck happens for the first hour and a half? You’ll be sorry I asked.

Pig Hunt

Four military buddies and a hot Asian chick go pig hunting in a wooded area filled with inbred hicks with guns, a hippie cult full of stoned naked chicks, and high-grade marijuana (aka, “The Devil’s Cabbage.”). It all ties together, though the characters are so comical as to be made up on the spot. (Hippies? Gimme a break.)

Pig Hunt

The cavity-ridden hicks make the bad guys in Road Warrior (1981) look like school crossing guards, stunt moto-crossing and dune buggy racing through the trees like they knew someone was filming ’em.

Pig Hunt

As for Ripper, the adorable 3,000 pound hog with an eye infection, he eats people. He doesn’t floss afterward. Not cool. Since his screen time is limited (as was my patience), you can see he’s an impressive beast, with teeth and tusks that look like industrial-grade roto-tillers. But he just saunters in, roars a bit, makes fart faces and slobbers all over the place. Sounds like me around beer #4.

Lots of gore, bare boobies, and severely ignored dental hygiene. Sounds like my neighbors.