Archive for Netherworld

Screaming Insects & Oatmeal

Posted in Science Fiction with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 6, 2016 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Shredder Orpheus

Hell has its own television network – and (gasp!) they need new prime time talent. Unfortunately, the Boys from Down Under have recruited a newly-wedded rock star’s bride for the position. (Dang, he didn’t even have sufficient time to feel her up).

Shredder Orpheus

The saddened hubby, a post-apocalyptic skater Goth punk who wears a headband, grabs his electric lyre (or “pocket harp”), hops a skateboard and goofy foots his way through the Netherworld in search of his kidnapped Goth biscuit. He eventually finds her, but she doesn’t want him anymore because she’s damned for all eternity (the measurement of time, not the over-priced perfume of the same name).

Shredder OrpheusAnd what does he get for all his efforts? A chainsaw to the neck. But not before he blurts out the winning line: “I’ve dedicated my life to the sounds of metal insects screaming in a wall of oatmeal.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve felt that same way.

Shredder Orpheus

Shredder Orpheus (1989), a pre-grunge twist on the Greek myth of Orpheus and Eurydice, was made and filmed in Seattle, were I’ve staked my claim since way before this obscure ditty came out. I wasn’t asked to be in it. Now everybody who was are can’t-walk-down-the-street famous, whereas I, to date, am not.

A Ghost Classic Made Ghostier?

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Ghosts with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 7, 2015 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Poltergeist

Skepticism was the first of many emotions that boiled all over my Old Navy™ shirt when news of a Poltergeist (1982) remake came a’blowin’ in the wind, followed by anger, sadness, frustration and an unquenchable thirst for Budwesier™ tallboys, which according to ancient biblical scriptures is indeed an emotion. But I digress.

Sam Raimi, the guy who brought us the unbeatably cool The Evil Dead (1981) and a metric crap ton of not-as-cool movies since, is behind Poltergeist (2015) and contemporizing the three decades old demonic ghost tale that had a little girl being sucked into the Netherworld of Hell (her closet), which forced her parents to go into the beyond (the closet) to rescue her.

PlotergeistI get that Sam has to cast this one in the here and now, but what does that mean to us who saw the original movie in an actual theater and not on a smart tablet back in the day? Here’s what Sam told me last week when I recently sat down for a light lunch with him at the sunny Marina del Rey:

“A family’s suburban home is invaded by angry spirits. When the terrifying apparitions escalate their attacks and take the youngest daughter, the family must come together to rescue her.”

I had the grilled chicken paillard with a starter of cheeses and charcuterie. Sam ordered the same thing he’s been eating since 1982.