Sex With Clones

Eve (formerly Sil), sci-fi’s hottest chick this side of Barbarella (1968), is back in Species II (1998), a limp hot dog sequel of intergalactic humping and scientific horror.

A crew on a flight to Mars is infected after they pick up soil samples loaded with alien DNA love snot. The contagious spore makes the shuttlenauts hornier than the last call crowd at Chuck & Sally’s Tavern™. One of the space guys goes around mmmbopping every gal he can get his pod on.

After a relaxing smoke and a 90-second gestation period, an alien offspring springs out of the host with a splashy, gory exit/entrance. It doesn’t have to be said that this is neat. The flawlessly beautiful Natasha Henstridge, returning as Eve (grown as a clone of herself), feels the need to breed with the spewing space boy to create a super-sized alien.

The big problem here is that Eve doesn’t drop top until the very end of the movie. Even then we only get a glimpse of the genetic jackpot that is her. Heck, she ran around buck naked throughout the entire first flick (Species/1995). When will major movie studios learn that bare booty equals boffo box office?

Alien Sex Fiend

Who says chick aliens can’t be blonde supermodels with lacy bras and out-of-this-world panties? Grown under strict lab conditions like the sea monkeys we paid $2.99 for from a comic book ad (but never received), Sil is an alien life-form about to be gassed in her glass-y test tube apartment.

She doesn’t like gas and manages to break out and run away where three things grow at an accelerated rate: her left boob, her right boob and her need to breed. I would like to meet this alien life-form for, um, scientific purposes, because I’m casually interested in space stuff.

Sil easily attracts men to have sex with her because she’s so hot and because she’s naked, the two basic components of life itself. The scientists, though, need to track her down before she morphs into Miss Mars Attacks and kills everyone.

Fortunately for ME, Sil mates a couple of times and manages to evade those that hunt her down, eventually transforming into her true self. And what a cool true self alien she is, what with her internal organs easily viewable through her transparent cartilage that is her outer skin stuff.

Sil’s rampant horniness makes sense when she finally gives birth to a freakish lunar rug rat. All of this is pretty neat, but the part where Sil walks around without earth clothes emphasizes quantum physics as it applies to the ever-expanding universe. In order for a science fiction movie like Species (1995) to be believable, you kinda gotta have that.