
2020’s Land Shark is identically the same as first released Land Shark (2017). In order to avoid a death-by-bankruptcy lawsuit, Land Shark might consider changing its title to Soil Sushi or Ground Gobbler or Tooth Acres. Worth looking into.

Land Shark gives new meaning to the phrase, “eat my dirt” in that this ‘roid-raging, GMO-modified molar mouth really chews up the scenery — and every two-legged entrees standing on it. He can swim through the aforementioned dirt, gravel, cement, asphalt, and probably football field AstroTurf™ as easily as backstroking in a community swimming pool garnished with dangling limbs. Also, L-Shark can leap out of the water (when he’s in it), way higher than that Free Willy fat ass.

Infused with the DNA of an earthworm (weakly explaining LS’s earthiness), the pissed off shark goes on a rampage against those who messed him up in an underwater lab, all the while taking bold liberties with Deep Blue Sea (1999) and Bait 3D (2012). It’s theorized the shark is rabidly aggressive because it wants to eat and breed. Well, heck — who doesn’t?

But the borrowing/burrowing excitement doesn’t stop underwater, with Land-o hilariously pursuing the science team through a jungle, “swimming” across the ground as if it were a Slip ’n Slide™. But in the movie’s very first scene, the shark is 99 feet long (guessing), whereas he’s merely the size of an affordable two-seater Jet-Ski here. As the movie is in unreadable/unlearnable Mandarin (I thought Mandarin was a dinky orange), it’s possible the smaller shark was a different experiment and the bigger shark was its Au pair.

The head of the company that put a lotta fins toward developing the shark wants to capture it alive. The people it ate would probably respectfully disagree. Too late — Land Shark makes to the city where he somehow gets bigger again, and loads up on some screaming take-out. I could tell you how L’Shark meets his end, but you could probably guess. (If not, he ate an explosive.)
As for the shark itself, full-on metal. Specifically, if Motörhead was a shark instead of the WORLD’S GREATEST BAND, they’d look like Land Shark.
P.S. You can watch this free on Tubi™.
P.P.S. Sand Sharks (2012) should sue both of them.
P.P.P.S. Be sure and watch Free Willy 5 — Packed in Springwater.