Archive for moon landing

Leprosy Zombies, Ghosts Students, Fake Moon

Posted in Evil, Ghosts, Misc. Horror, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 25, 2017 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Magnificent Dead

Watching YET ANOTHER “the moon landing was faked” documentary. This is a British version. British people are too polite to lie. As for where I stand on this unending conspiracy, I do not believe our astronauts landed on the moon. I believe NASA built an artificial moon a few blocks from my apartment. That’s where they shot the footage and thereby faked the entire thing.

Only problem is, they didn’t get rid of the man-made moon and it’s just sitting there, all moldy and looking like an abandoned World’s Fair attraction. That, and it’s pull on our tides is screwing with my bath water. Stupid fake moon.

And here’s some upcoming horror and sci-fi that may or may not need to go in and/or out with the tide…

THE MAGNIFICENT DEAD (available now)
“In the 1870s in the small Texas town of Rosewood, local rancher Jared Hamilton and his men have declared war on the town, using fear and death to prevent a new railroad line from coming through. Guided by a priest, Father Julian the desperate town leaders decide to hire a group of six gunmen to help clean up the town. These gunmen are legendary, as they are afflicted with Leprosy and fight with reckless abandon and ruthlessness, for they have nothing to lose as they are already dead.”

Back in those days, lepers is what sick people were called instead of zombies/walking dead/undead/straddling the life/death fence’rs. The town leaders should’ve called on the Old West’s Jonah Hex because he’s a lot less “germ-y.” (Antibiotics weren’t invented until 1929 and then commercialized in the ’40s. I have no idea why I know that.)

Inheritance

INHERITANCE (June 2, 2017/Limited)
Ryan Bowman has just inherited a $2.5 million beach house on the central California coast from his biological father, a man he’s never known and thought long dead. Arriving in the charming town with his pregnant fiancé, Ryan’s curiosity about his father soon leads him into an introspective investigation. As a looming family presence tightens its grip on him, Ryan pushes away his adoptive family and expectant fiancé. When he finally discovers the horrifying truth about his birth parents, he might be too late to stop himself from repeating a similar pattern.”

Who cares? A $2.5 million dollar beach house?!? Geez, quit yer b*tchin’ and TAKE THE MONEY. Some people don’t know when to just shut up and make their way towards the cake.

The School

THE SCHOOL (2017/2018)
Amy, an attractive, successful surgeon, struggles to cope with her emergency room duties and those of a young mother looking after her hospitalized son who has fallen into a coma. After being reprimanded by her boss, Dr. Wang, for obsessively believing her son will wake up, she becomes trapped in a coma/purgatory of her own – The School – where children from her past emerge to taunt and test her to her core, putting in doubt whether Amy will be able to save her son and leave The School.”

Her boss is Dr. Wang? Wonder if he’s a urologist?

POSSUM (2017/2018)
“A disgraced children’s puppeteer returns to his childhood home and is forced to confront his wicked stepfather and the secrets that have tortured him his entire life.”

You know you’ve hit rock bottom when you end up as a disgraced puppeteer. That’s right in there with being self-employed and hating the guy you’re working for.

The Moon is a Conspiracy

Posted in Science Fiction, UFOs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 19, 2016 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Operation Avalanche

Of the funniest things on YouTube™ are the conspiracy theory videos, everything from the Kennedy assassination (the CIA did it) and 911 (George Bush did it), to UFO denial (the military keeps doing it) and the best of ’em all, how the Apollo moon landing on July 20, 1969 was faked. (Pffft – the astronauts were real; it’s the moon that was faked.)

Room 237

According to the Internet, legendary filmmaker Stanley Kubrick, who did The Shining, was hired by NASA to stage the entire thing as we didn’t have the technology to pull it off in 1969. In fact, the 2013 documentary Room 237 is an exhaustive analysis about how Kubrick hid hints in The Shining about his involvement in the cover-up that still endures to this day at fever pitch.

Operation Avalanche

How fun for the rest of us who are greatly amused and entertained by all of this that there are two new movies about the faked moon deal. Operation Avalanche (2016) goes like this: “In 1967, four undercover CIA agents were sent to NASA posing as a documentary film crew. What they discovered led to one of the biggest conspiracies in American history.”

Moonwalkers

Then there’s Moonwalkers (2015), starring none other than Harry Potter’s favorite ginger, Ron Weasley. Here’s how that one goes: “After failing to locate the legendary Stanley Kubrick, an unstable CIA agent (Ron Perlman) must instead team up with a seedy rock band manager (Rupert Grint) to develop the biggest con of all time-staging the moon landing.”

Faked

This is all so flippin’ cool and a veritable fountain of validation for all those faked moon landing nutbags who have spent countless hours/years clicking around the Internet for “proof” of something that happened 47 years ago. (Note to nutbags – don’t stop busting NASA’s chops; I’m loving every second of it.)

Alien Rock Spiders

Posted in Aliens, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 7, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Apollo 18

The real surprise wasn’t that we discovered extraterrestrial rock spiders on the moon, it’s that we never brought ’em back and figured out how to make money off them.

Apollo 18

Apollo 18, a top secret three-man moon landing mission back in the ’70s, was a Dept. of Defense grocery run. What they instructed the astronauts to do is set up a bunch of cameras to “spy” on Russia. Kinda hard to do when the Russians already have a lunar module just around the crater, it’s pilot found dead and his corpse drained of any and all vodka.

Apollo 18

Doesn’t take long before interrupted signals, U.S. flags uprooted and lunar rovers looking like a destruction derby start rattling the nerves of the two guys on the moon’s surface. (The other guy was orbiting and thanking the lucky stars around him that he wasn’t being attacked by rock spider aliens).

Apollo 18

As “found footage” goes, the recreation of the moon landing and authentic look of our most boring space neighbor, is pretty cool. And even as kinda neat as the spider aliens are, all we get to do is watch the astronauts’ impending doom. The Dept. of Defense throws in an obvious twist, something you could’ve seen from Mars. But without more backstory, Apollo 18 (2011), as ambitious as it is, lands on a flat surface. Kinda like the moon, home of alien rock spiders who have no respect for the American flag, those hippies.