Archive for Infected

Fishy Horror

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 29, 2015 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Weaverfish

First tripped across the British horror movie Weaverfish on YouTube™ back in summer of 2013. I watched the trailer, read the movie description and was duly unimpressed. Then I clicked away, vowing never to return.

It’s now summer-ish of 2015 and Weaverfish is now downloadable and/or rentable on Vimeo™. Watching the updated trailer, I’m still wondering what the movie is about.

Weaverfish

Here’s the description: “Trouble lurks when a group of friends enter the restricted grounds of a condemned oil plant, eager to exploit its secluded river creek for a night of partying. The eventful weekend takes a sickening turn when one by one they fall victim to a grossly disfiguring infection.”

“The rapidly deteriorating members embark on a journey back to civilization through the woods, unaware of the other presence hunting them down. As their weekend suddenly escalates into a chilling race for survival, the dangers of their trespassing finally begin to surface, untangling a surprising and shocking conspiracy.”

Weaverfish

Still confused. Some deep research (clicking on a link) into the weaverfish (or “weever”)  revealed it to be 37 cms in length, mainly brown in color, and have poisonous spines on their first dorsal fins and gills. Weevers are sometimes used as an ingredient in the recipe for bouillabaisse. Guess what I’m gonna quit eating.

So maybe the oil-polluted water mutated the fish and the fish infected the dumbass teens who drink and take illegal drugs and smoke, when it’s been proved over and over that smoking is not good for you and carries long-term health complications. Dumbasses.

Weaverfish

Then the movie goes on to propose there’s a mysterious stalker who tracks down the infected teens. Maybe the stalker is trying to cover up the mutated weaverfish (or “weevers”). I just don’t know.

What I do know, however, is that all species in the weaverfish family are restricted to the eastern Atlantic (including the Mediterranean). Man, I hate it when horror movies make me do homework.

A World Infected With Zombies

Posted in Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 8, 2015 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Infected

In the mood for YET ANOTHER generic zombie movie? Then you’re in luck because the generically titled Infected arrives June 2, 2015 and features a generic global pandemic that turns people into generic flesh-eating monsters while a generic group of survivors and a generic army squad hole up in a generic shelter and generically yell and cuss at each other as their generic food supply and ammunition runs out while the generic zombies close in.

If you watch the trailer, you’ve pretty much seen the whole movie. Am I being too harsh? Not when the above scenario has been done so many times I’ve lost count. And I can count pretty high. (I’m almost up to 1,000. Soon, very soon.)

The More The Carrier

Posted in Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction with tags , , , , , , , , on April 12, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Carriers

A virus – or “plague” – has swept the landscape. If you’re infected, you’re soon dead as there is no quick fix. If you’re not gooned out, you have to wipe everything down with bleach. (That stuff will burn your eyes if you use too much.) If someone looks OK, assume that they aren’t and kill them. Twice, if you have time.

Carriers

Brothers Danny and Brian, along with their girlfriends (OK, Danny isn’t really seeing the chick tagging along, but who else is left on Earth to date?), are as yet not externally bleeding. They’re heading to the ocean where it’s clean. Hopefully.

Carriers

Along the way, a tense encounter with a man and his sick two-year old daughter results in them all traveling together, the new passengers sealed off with plastic tarp and masking tape in the back of Sick Car, everyone else with dust masks in relative comfort up front. The plan is to head to a rumored town up ahead where there was a wonder vaccine that showed promise and a working bathroom. Outta luck and out of service.

Carriers

The kid coughs on Brian’s girlfriend. Too bad she didn’t tell Brian. Too bad Brian likes to make out with her. Too bad he has to break up with her (i.e., leaving her on the side of the road). Once contracted, the disease does a slow burn, rotisserie browning your face, leaving your eyeballs as red as the aftermath of a Jack Daniels™ Box Social.

Carriers

But like all heartwarming pandemic stories, Carriers (2009) comes to a predictable end that, while sufficiently enacted, leaves you wanting more virus rot. In other words, it should’ve made you sicker, but in a good way.

Canadian Alien

Posted in Aliens, Foreign Horror, Science Fiction with tags , , , , , , , , on September 25, 2013 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Infected

Infected (2008), a genre derivative Canadian television adventure/science-fiction thriller, is also known as They’re Among Us and The Hatching. Stinkweed by any other name is still stinkweed.

Infected

An X-Files re-dux, which also borrows heavily from Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956), a newspaper reporter and his ex-girlfriend (also a reporter, who won’t put it on the glass for him anymore), uncover an extraterrestrial plan to take over human bodies so that aliens can live more comfortably on this toilet Earth.

Infected

Most of Infected is spent running, hiding, and uncovering proof of the colonization. What little pay-off there is comes in the form of a naked humans wrapped in sheets that probably won’t be able to be cleaned and kept under alien sedation in a facility that looks suspiciously like my proctologist’s office.

Infected

Once the aliens have been outed their true selves emerge, looking like a cross between a lobster and black. The reporter risks his neck to save his ex, who previously did not want to put it on the glass for him anymore. But it’s amazing how alien intervention can mend broken glass.

So does Infected end happily for the aliens or the humans? I am beyond caring.