Archive for Halloween II

It’s A Wonderful Knife

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Ghosts, Scream Queens, Slashers with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 1, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Halloween II

Halloween II (2009), picking up exactly where 2007’s Halloween remake left off, it is assumed the unspeaking/unstoppable Michael Myers has been “killed” by career babysitter Laurie Strode by means of some sort of bullet.

Halloween 2

After that complimentary ambulance ride to the morgue came to an abrupt cow-splattering halt, Michael’s body was never recovered. But that doesn’t stop Dr. Loomis from doing a Dr. Phil and going for all the glory-hogging during a book-signing tour about his most famous patient, whom he insists is dead. Michael’s still alive and sequestered in the woods for the last year, keeping a journal of his thoughts and eating… Let’s just say Michael’s not a vegan.

Halloween II

Laurie now lives with Sheriff Brackett and his same-age-as Laurie daughter, Annie. Laurie’s been having reoccurring acute nightmares as a direct result of her traumatic experiences with Michael trying to kill her face off. She takes pills, goes to therapy and screams ALL THE TIME.Halloween II

Michael is having a few dreams of his own, that of his dead mother (Sheri Moon Zombie) dressed in white, accompanied by a large white horse. You don’t have to be a therapist to figure out that action. Mommy wants to get the family back together, so Michael goes returns to Haddonfield to round up Laurie, whether she comes kicking and screaming or not.

Halloween II

Along the way, some particularly brutal, up-close-and-personal flesh ventilating, complimentary of Michael’s handy cutlery skills. Then there’s dog-eating. And redneck crunching. And ambulance driver squishing. And head-stomping. And stripper bashing. The body count is as high as my IQ.

Halloween II

Michael makes it to Haddonfield just in time for the family reunion, which just happens to be on Halloween. (So that’s why they named the movie Halloween.) Laurie reads Loomis’ book and discovers she’s Michael’s sister, Angel. (That’s not a plot spoiler, dang it — if you’ve seen any of the original Halloween movies you already knew this. If you didn’t, well, sorry.)

Halloween II

Some may argue Halloween II is nothing more than a snuff film with no discernible plot, or the way Michael stomps his carbon footprint all over the human ecosystem. But isn’t that the premise of all the Halloween movies (except Halloween III: Season of the Witch/1982)? As for me, I enjoyed the Haddonfield out of it.

Must be The Season of the Witch

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Science Fiction, Witches with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 31, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Halloween III: Season of the Witch

Despite being made by John Carpenter, the same guy who did Halloween (1978) and Halloween II (1981), Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982) has nothing to do with its predecessors. That’s good because there’s only so many sexually-active teens you can poke with a knife before it gets boring.

Halloween III: Season of the Witch

A druid descendant, fronting as the silver head of Silver Shamrock Novelties™, makes full-head witch, pumpkin and skeleton Halloween masks. These popular items are embedded with a microchip made from pieces of Stonehenge™, and placed there by robots with nice hair. If you’re wearing the mask and watching TV at the specially-designated time, you’ll see the broadcast Halloween secret. And that secret is that it activates the microchip in your mask and your head implodes and turns into snakes and bugs. Oh, yeah – green stuff that used to be your brains also leaks out.

Halloween III: Season of the Witch

An alcoholic doctor uncovers the plan and, with hottie Stacy Nelkin, tries to convince TV stations to not run the commercial so that kids all over the world won’t get the living room carpet dirty with particulate matter. Good luck with that.

Halloween III: Season of the Witch

As cornball as it all is, Halloween III: Season of the Witch is a fair investment for your DVD rental coupons. Bonus: Once you hear Silver Shamrock’s “Happy, Happy Halloween” theme song used for the marketing of said kill masks, you won’t be able to get it out of your, uh, head.

Ice ‘n Slice

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Scream Queens, Slashers, TV Vixens with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 17, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Cold Prey

The winterized Norwegian slopes are holiday packed, so snowboarding 20-somethings go off the beaten track, only to have the third wheel single guy break his party leg. Fortunately, they’re near an abandoned since 1975 ski lodge that still has alcohol, food, working power generators, warm blankets and a psychopathic slasher killer dude.

Cold Prey

With a snow storm setting in (right on schedule), only thing left to do is die. Systematically, each of the group is hit in the back with an ice axe by a silent man in a ratty snow jacket and dark goggles. Doesn’t sound like a way I’d like to spend my snowboarding holiday.

Cold Prey

Thinking he hacked the last girl standing, the slasher piles the bodies on a sled and hauls them to a crevice, where each corpse is tossed, like old car tires in a gully or “Texas recycling center”).

Cold Prey

Part Halloween (1978) and part The Shining (1980), there are some ambient moments in Cold Prey (2006), but the gore is sparse, the plot derivative and the nudity nonexistent. And I thought Norwegians were more open-minded about that kind of stuff.

In Cold Prey 2 (aka, Cold Prey: Resurrection/2008), Jannicke, the gal who sole-survived the uncalled for ice axe attack in the first movie, makes it back to town and is brought to a hospital.  Another survivor arrives as well – the slasher she thought she killed.

Cold Prey 2

The hospital lights go out and the entire medical care facility is turning into a morgue, as the killer – quite preictably – goes after Jannicke.

Cold Prey 2

I liked this better when they called it Halloween II (1981).