Archive for Debbie Rochon

Scream Queen Christmas

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Scream Queens, Slashers, TV Vixens with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 29, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Santa Claws

Spoofing her own career as a scream queen, the luscious Debbie Rochon plays Raven Quinn, a B-movie starlet who attracts the unwanted attentions of her mentally-unhinged neighbor.

Santa Claws

He has a shrine to her in his apartment, and the fact that she takes off her clothes for a living is making him mad (which attracted him to her in the first place, the nut bag). Dressing up as Santa Claus, the killer dispatches those who are naughty and not nice with a plastic garden claw. Ouchy.

Santa Claws

While all of this is happening, Debbie’s movie husband is doing it with one of her co-stars. Talk about double dipping.

Santa Claws

Santa Claws came out a while back (1996), but it’s been re-released with a bunch of cut scenes and a bloopers reel at the end. Debbie is marvelous and quite liberal with her morals, the killings are of the G-rated variety, and the abundant boobage make many appearances. The only thing missing is a crack-driven Rudolph goring people with his seasonal antlers of doom.

Debbie Rochon

Dirt Witch

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Scream Queens, TV Vixens, Witches with tags , , , , , , , , , , on October 30, 2017 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Skin Crawl

Back in the days of conjuring, but well before toothpaste, three witch sisters are caught invoking the evil name of nature. One of the sister’s is taken outside by three men with rotted teeth where she is sexed and punched in the stomach area until she dies.

Skin Crawl

This makes the other two witches get their broomsticks in a knot, so they call upon the Prince of Darkness for vengeance. He arrives in a puff of smoke and computer-generated flames and looks like a giant pipe cleaner figure…an EVIL pipe cleaner.

Skin Crawl

Flash forward to modern times where toothpaste and dental floss are plentiful. Margaret, a gorgeous and successful real estate agent, is trapped in a loveless marriage. She also has an affinity for bugs, worms…anything that crawls. She’s also a dead ringer for one of the witches to the point of being an exact twin. How did they do that?

Skin Crawl

While Margaret’s at work, her shifty husband is having sexings with a skank, who convinces him to kill his wife and inherit all her money and then they can have sexings all the time. The scheming skank also happens to know some killful killers for hire, so while they’re off stabbing Margaret with an abnormally large pocket knife, the husband is busy gettin’ busy. Fortunately, the thugs bury Margaret’s body in the woods, right where the witch sister was killed. This means the dirt is bewitched, the implications and possibilities for revenge now being limitless.

Skin Crawl

Uh, oh…someone just crawled out of her impromptu grave to balance the scales of justice. Margaret’s killing spree, like the rest of Skin Crawl (2007), is fairly tame, but it’s what she does to the skank will bring a smile to your face. And yes, it involves bugs and maggots and icky stuff. Ewwww!

Werewolf Vampire Mix Tape

Posted in Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Scream Queens, TV Vixens, Vampires, Werewolves with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 7, 2016 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Rage of the Werewolf

Rage of the Werewolf (1999) finds Earth infested with lycanthropes (and vampires and mutants) whose dormant genes have been activated by the moon’s gravitational suck, which was pushed closer to our ozone by a meteor. Stupid space rocks – always up to atmospheric assh*lery.

Rage of the Werewolf

A power mad werewolf captures a vampire to mix their blood in order to create a super monster hybrid (this concept pre-dated evolution by years), the plan being to rid the world of stink humans who hunt them for their pelts.

Rage of the Werewolf

Horror icon Debbie Rochon plays the delicious Kessa, a female vampire who is used for the biting experiments. Working on a $1.50 budget, Rage of the Werewolf can be excused for the silliest looking werewolves this side of Howling IV: The Original Nightmare (1988/bear costumes with rubber fangs). The monsters growl like they’re working on a stubborn stool, but there is a nice amount of gore — and Debbie.

To think what they could have done with a $3.00 budget.

The World’s Breast Horror Movie

Posted in Misc. Horror, Science Fiction, Scream Queens, TV Vixens with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 19, 2015 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Killer Rack

A horror movie about killer boobs. There are days I get up and think, “What a wonderful world this is!”

Killer Rack – still in production as of right now (April, 2015) – is a heartfelt/boobfelt film that stars Debbie Rochon, one of my all-time favorite genre actresses. While Deb’s been featured in dozens of indie horror/sci-fi movies removing her bra for the sake of making the plots cohesive, this time she plays Dr. Cate Thulu, who does breast implants for those deflated by life.

Killer Rack

Betty Downer, one of Dr. Thulu’s patients, gets new market melons and life is good until she finds out they’re man-eaters, Lovecraft-esque monsters looking to end mankind one grope at a time.

Killer Rack

As her boobs are Lovecraft inspired mutations, Dr. Cate Thulu’s name makes way more sense. (Tell me you got the reference.)

Killer Rack

You can help Killer Rack see the light of day via their Indie Go Go fundraising page [click here ]. Don’t let the their efforts sag and the project go bust.

Heh.

 

Swamp Things

Posted in Evil, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Scream Queens, Witches, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on March 19, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Bog Creatures

A history professor  needs to verify his theories that a race of totally mean army guys called Berserkers (looking like they just stepped out of Supercuts™) existed to do nothing but chase shirtless chicks around and use their blood for some sort of ritual. So he sends five lippy college kids out into the swamp to dig up remains.

Bog Creatures

During the dig a frightened chick is discovered, her camp in disarray and her tight shirt barely clinging for life. The forest poop and rummage sale clothed Bog Creatures, unhappy that their rituals were interrupted for a few hundred years, begin again, rise and go berserk on the twerps.

Bog Creatures

In an “almost didn’t see it coming” twist (insert roll-y eyed sarcasm here), the frightened chick turns out to be a descendant of the priestess doing all the rituals back in the day, and is responsible for gassing up the Boggy Men. “Look at me—I raised the dead…and I didn’t even finish grad school!” she gleefully proclaims. Good for her.

Bog Creatures

Bog Creatures (2003) are as threatening as mud puddles and the students deserve a failing grade for thinking they could act their way out of the swamp.

The Day The Laughter Died

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Ghosts, Scream Queens, Slashers, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , on February 19, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Dead Clowns

Back in the good ’ol days a circus train turned into a circus submarine when it went off the tracks and into the ocean, thereby drowning all the entertainment clowns and getting them permanently soaking wet. Fifty years later, the clowns have come back from the dead to eat the guts of the living. Don’t ask me to explain why, just go with it.

Dead Clowns

Interesting premise, but the plot is full of more holes than my retirement portfolio. If the clowns coming back from the dead have been underwater for 50 years, why are their costumes clean, dry and looking like they were washed in some sort of high-priced laundry detergent?

Dead Clowns

And when the zombie clowns attack – practically in slow motion – how is it no one can get away? And why is it when the zombie clowns tear into your flesh and graphically consume your flesh and take some flesh to go in doggie bags, that they don’t go for the more savory buttsteak instead of the less flavorful lower intestines?

Dead Clowns

Dead Clowns (2003) – plus: explicit flesh-eating. Minus: everything except explicit flesh-eating.