Archive for C.H.U.D.

Keeping an Eye on Sci-Fi

Posted in Aliens, Classic Horror, Evil, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Scream Queens, UFOs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 29, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

The Beast With 1,000,000 Eyes

The “beast” in The Beast With 1,000,000 Eyes (1955) is really an alien, at times represented as a blinking soup can that acts as housing for irritating mind waves.

The Beast With 1,000,000 Eyes

This morphing soup can, um, alien doesn’t have a million eyes on its own space face. Rather, it overtakes birds, dogs, barnyard animals, and even a steer (cow on steroids), to “see” for him.

The Beast With 1,000,000 Eyes

So instead of finding the nearest girl’s locker room, the extraterrestrial dumbass attacks a farming family who bitch and argue so much, you’d wish they’d just stab each other in the pig pen with pitchforks.

The Beast With 1,000,000 Eyes

The alien makes life even more uncomfortable for the Kelly family, who has a mute worker living on their property, doing glamorous chores like licking chicken eggs clean enough for market and turning cow pies when the sun cooks ’em to a nice pancake brown.

The Beast With 1,000,000 Eyes

Under the control of The Soup, the minimum wage mute goes after the hot teen daughter, setting off a chain of events that is right up there with watching water heat on the stove. Why the alien didn’t mind-control a common pterodactyl or a C.H.U.D. was a serious misstep that resulted in everyone yawning in its general direction.

This C.H.U.D.’s For You

Posted in Classic Horror, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , on October 31, 2013 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

C.H.U.D.

The Nuclear Regulatory Commission has been storing radioactive waste in the sewers under the streets of New York. And since most of the homeless live rent-free in the fragrant underground, the dots connect themselves.

C.H.U.D.

Radioactivity has time-tested body distorting properties, so it’s an easy leap to assume the C.H.U.D. (Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers) are in fact the grotesquely mutated creatures that have been feasting on those who are not.

C.H.U.D.

Looking like something that came out of a heavy metal song, these inside-out-faced creatures leave a wake of half-eaten humans all around the sewers. Waste not, want not. They could at least wrap up the leftovers for citizen stew or street chili.

C.H.U.D.

Topside, they’re planning to gas the sewers in a feeble attempt to put the thud on the C.H.U.D. They better hurry – the monsters, with glowing eyes, can-opener-strength claws, and radioactive slobber – are getting into apartment buildings and restaurants.

C.H.U.D.

Underpin all of this with testy New Yorkers and a government cover-up, and sit back and watch the mutated flesh hit the fan. They don’t show the monsters actually ripping apart humans and dining on skin snacks, which was a big disappointment. All you see is brief flashes of the underground dwellers, which is a shame as they look kinda cool.

C.H.U.D.

Most of C.H.U.D.’s (1984) action centers around ill-tempered New Yorkers who act as though radioactive sewer monsters were just a part of every day life. Maybe they are.