Archive for bloodsucker

A World of Vampires

Posted in Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Vampires with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 4, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Daybreakers

The world is a vampire. Literally. It’s 2019. Ten years ago, an unexplained plague turned those that leak blood into those that drink blood. Oh sure, there are a few humans left, but they’re pretty much cows the vampires milk dry. So much so, the world is just about out of the sweet red body sauce. 

Daybreakers

Edward Dalton is a blood scientist who has been trying for six years to come up with a human blood substitute. His latest batch made a test subject explode. BLAMMO —   vampire guts all over the walls and floors, as if the room itself was mortally injured. Dalton won’t drink human blood because he’s against wiping out an entire species. What a wuss. In the human world, we’d call him a people-hugger.

Daybreakers

One night he helps an SUV full of humans evade the cops. They later track him down in hopes he can help them find a cure for vampirism. (Yeah — it’s called a stake through the heart, b*tch!)

Daybreakers

Elvis is a classic car restorer and part of the vampire resistance movement who, when in bloodsucker form years ago, went joy-riding in the daylight and crashed, his body flaming the second he went Superman-ing through the windshield. The accident, while hurting like hell, transformed Elvis back into a human. Dalton needs to recreate that event in order to find a way out of this sucking of blood business. He has to hurry as the military — led by his vampire brother — and a near-rioting society is breathing down his back.

DaybreakersIf you’re starved of human blood and all its deliciousness, you slowly revert into a primal state vampire, one of pure aggression, a mummified body, leathery bat wings, and unpleasant butt breath. These creatures, called Subsiders, are so hungry they feed on fellow vampires, which speeds up the mutation process.

Daybreakers

Through it all, though, Daybreakers (2009) left you wanting more and less. More, as in Subsiders. Less, as in talking. Don’t get me wrong; Daybreakers is a visual stunner and has some killer graphic gore; Subsiders are chained and pulled out into the sunlight, where they ignite like campfire marshmallows. I just wanted to see more of the Subsiders making a cherry pie out of your face. If you’re gonna go to all that trouble to make a screaming, angry man-bat, put it to work chowing down on neck sandwiches. The rest will write itself.

White Trash Vampires and Werewolves

Posted in Evil, Misc. Horror, Vampires, Werewolves with tags , , , , , , , , on January 29, 2018 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Death Hunter: Werewolves vs. Vampires

Vampires and werewolves are at each others’ throats (heh) in the ambitious, though low budget Death Hunter: Werewolves vs. Vampires (2010). Who wins? Well, if you’re a human, you already know the answer.

Death Hunter: Werewolves vs. Vampires

Jack Croix and his market fresh wife whose newly pregnant, get lost driving around the desert and, running out of precious gasoline, pull into a way out of the way dive bar for help. What they get is the drink emporium’s white trash clientele are all vampires. That sucks. (Oh, hey — I just got my own joke!)

Death Hunter: Werewolves vs. Vampires

Jack’s packin’ a gun and try as he may to perforate them with a weapon that doesn’t seem to run out of bullets, his wife is taken by the vampires and he’s left to wander the desert, where werewolves play in the dirt.

Death Hunter: Werewolves vs. Vampires

John’s rescued and taken in by a mysteriously hooded man whose own wife was imminent domained by the vampire clan. Since that time, he’s lived in a cave and honed his vampire/werewolf recycling program. And over the next few months, teaches his skillz to John. But dang it, the man got his fleshy parts bitten by a werewolf during an ambush and won’t be alive long enough to pay next month’s dwelling rent.

Death Hunter: Werewolves vs. Vampires

This causes John to take up the cause, shave his head and face with a hunting knife (no shaving cream for this hunter of death) and set out to get his wife back, who has been turned into a pregnant vampire. Along the way, John runs into two young couples, also lost in the desert, but still managing to play strip poker while driving. The attacking werewolves don’t play strip poker — they play stripped flesh.

Death Hunter: Werewolves vs. Vampires

During the simmering climax, John locates the vampire stronghold — in a wine cellar — and his wife, who along with the other had vampire concubines — is sleeping standing up. In the desert there are no pillows. If John kills the main vampire, he gets his wife back, defanged and about six months pregnant.Death Hunter: Werewolves vs. VampiresThe “battle” is so limp as to be uncooked bacon. Very little nudity (opening sequence), and a smattering of blood. Somehow I expected more from dive bar/white trash vampires and wereolves whose boss is a digital video game reject.