Archive for Black Water

Rock Around The Croc

Posted in Giant Monsters, Nature Gone Wild with tags , , , , , , on June 1, 2016 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Black Water

Based on a true story, vacation-minded folks boating around Australia’s croc-infested mangrove swamps barely get their hooks in the water when the boat is hit and overturned. The guide is the first to “be taken.” The others manage to get up a tree, which if you know Australian crocodiles, isn’t up high enough. (Think eight-foot hoop and a six-foot basketball player.)

Black Water

Playing out like Open Water (2003), a man and the two ladies are trapped miles from nowhere, and their boat — about 20 feet away — is upside down and their only hope of getting out of the tangle of trees. Sucks to be them.

Black Water

Inevitable loss of blood drips into the swamp water. To a crocodile that’s like throwing the bakery doors open. Speaking of, the reptile is not digital (thank you), and behaves like any other animal in the wild would when presented with taste-test opportunities.

Black Water

All the scenes are really intense whenever someone gets in the water because you know the croc is in the vicinity, but you only see a few bubbles coming to the surface (maybe he ate a human bean burrito earlier).

Black Water

Black Water (2007) is a nicely realistic flick, although I really wish they would’ve named the ravaging reptile something along the lines of Sir Bites Alot or Carl “Deathroll” Chewingham. But if it wants to remain nameless, that’s okay by me.

People McNuggets

Posted in Classic Horror, Giant Monsters, Nature Gone Wild with tags , , , , , , , on January 18, 2014 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Rogue

When you get down to it, giant crocodiles eating people is a solid business model. You have your scenic outdoor sequences, nature narratives, screamy tourists, and hey, no unnecessary story lines – just meet ’n eat.

Rogue

A bowlful, uh, boatload of tourists vacationing in Australia go up the wrong river without a paddle. Something – I’m not saying what – smashes into their flotation device and flips it over, forcing them to swim for a small mud island.

Rogue

Some can dog-paddle faster than others. Good for them. Those who can’t… You may as well call the sandbar a dinner plate as it isn’t much of a safe haven due to a fast rising tide, leaving the leftovers, uh, tourists to figure out how to get across the river to what they think is safe ground. From here on out it’s a guessing game to see which annoying tourist gets snacked in half and in what order before the “into the croc pot” ending.

Rogue The tourist guide – a blonde supermodel – still thinks she’s in charge. That is, until Mr. Snappy makes out with her with his toothy kiss of death. So much for a second date.

Rogue

Great butt-clenching tension as everyone tries to get to dry land on a rope line suspended a few feet over the water. The angle of the dangle. You know what’s gonna happen, but it’s still fun to see it all go down. (Yeah, down Mr. Snappy’s throat – ha!)

Rogue

The crocodile of the moment is pretty big (the credits say 23 feet in length), doesn’t look fake and prefers a side order of screaming with his meals. Which makes Rogue (2007) on par with the other exact plot croc movie, Black Water (2007) and almost as good as Primeval (2007). Like I said, a solid business model.