Archive for birthday party

Zombie Croc: Reanimated Reptile

Posted in Giant Monsters, Nature Gone Wild, Scream Queens, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 25, 2015 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Zombie Croc

In horror movies, crocodiles, or “alligators,” have been super-sized, mechanized and man-made to terrorize for our viewing pleasure. But when was the last time you saw a walking dead gator? Now you can with the release of Zombie Croc, billing itself as 35 feet of undead reptilian terror. Only thing missing is some drunk rednecks with shotguns and…oh, wait…

Zombie Croc

The best way to bring a crocodile back from the dead is with voodoo. I know what you’re thinking; what about a space virus or secret government/military powdered gas or sweet refreshing pollution? Those things cost money. Voodoo is practically free – just yammer out a bunch of nonsensical curse words, shake some bones (not your own, you pervs), and get this party started.

Zombie Croc

Speaking of parties, the voodoo-risen zombie croc crashes a birthday party and chomps down all the screaming desserts. Earlier he ate a clown hired to perform at said box social. He said the clown tasted funny. (Heh.)

Zombie Croc

Zombie Croc (also listed as A Zombie Croc as well – not sure why) was screened in July of 2015 at a party I wasn’t invited to. (That’s ok; I sent zombie croc in my place.) When will ZC be commercially released to fulfill your low-budget horror comedy needs? Dunno. Their movie’s Facebook™ page is as weak as the storyline.

Clowning Around With Horror

Posted in Classic Horror, Evil, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , on March 1, 2015 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Clown

The easily pronounced Clown, a horror movie about a clown of some sort, came out in 2014. I think. I looked and looked and was unsuccessful at locating an illegal bootlegged copy. Or even a legally bootlegged copy.

So imagine the sound of my relief (which took the form of a carbonated burp) when I found out Clown comes out on DVD in the UK on March 2, 2015. yeah, I’ll have to book a flight to England to snag a copy. But this thing looks cool enough for me to gamble my rent on.

ClownSo what has my balloons in a knot over Clown? Check this out: “It’s Jack’s 10th birthday, but the clown has cancelled. His dad, Kent, finds an old clown suit in the attic and saves the party. ”

“But after the party is over, Kent has a problem – the suit won’t come off. What starts as a joke quickly turns into a hellish nightmare. Kent can feel himself changing, and his desperate attempts to free himself just leave him in agonizing pain.”

“As the suit takes hold of his body, Kent slowly endures a brutal transformation. As he changes, an uncontrollable hunger begins to consume him, an overwhelming and insatiable hunger…for children.”

Holy crap balls – Kent turns into a flesh-eating party clown and eats kids. That is so flippin’ cool and/or harsh. Kids probably taste good because all those little runts ever eat is sugar. So it’d be like chowing down on a screaming candy bar.

I wonder how much Kent charges for private parties?