Archive for Asian Sci-Fi

Godzilla = Winzilla

Posted in Asian Horror, Asian Sci-Fi, Classic Horror, Foreign Horror, Giant Monsters, Godzilla, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 9, 2017 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Shin Godzilla

With a mere four Oscars™, the gore slasher flick La La Land (2016) has nothing on Shin Godzilla (2016), which stomped away with SEVEN Japan Academy Prizes in Tokyo on March 2, 2017.

Shin Godzilla

Besides pocketing over $72 million fun coupons, which converts to over eight BILLION yen, Shin Godzilla snagged the awards for Best Picture and Best Director. I should’ve been for nominated for Best Fan. Since Godzilla has so many awards, maybe he’ll let me have one. That, or scrunch me into sidewalk paste.

Shin Godzilla

And to make your day even better than it was before you read that last sentence, Shin Godzilla is releasing here in the States on March 22, 2017. There’s a plus and minus to this joyous news: Comicbook.com reports that it won’t contain English sub-titles. (Toho™, who owns every radioactive/copyrighted particle of Godzilla’s DNA, is notorious for this jerk maneuver.)

Shin Godzilla

However, Funimation™, located in Flower Mound, Texas (that town name sounds naughty for some reason), will be releasing Shin Godzilla with all the pronounceable bells and whistles in October of 2017. The price? Who cares? It’s Godzilla, man! Even at eight billion yen, it’ll still be a bargain.

Kaijus, Bigfoot and Future Cephalopods

Posted in Asian Sci-Fi, Bigfoot, Foreign Horror, Giant Monsters, Godzilla, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Slashers with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 20, 2017 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

 

Colossal

The butt-numbing cold and saturating winter rain of 2017 in Seattle has been conducive to staying indoors and watching horror movies. You could couch out to other types of movies, but horror/sci-fi seems to vibe with the doom and gloom outside. While there are no sharknadoes or lavalantulas shooting out of our local volcanoes (we have several), just the thought of going outside and getting my hair messed up by the wind and/or rain goons me out. Call me indoor face. I’ll come out of my burrow when the sun arrives, which is usually around July.

Here’s some upcoming bad weather movies to watch indoors…

Colossal

COLOSSAL (April, 2017)
“A woman moves back home after losing her job and being dumped by her boyfriend. Her life takes a sudden turn when a giant kaiju-like creature appears in South Korea and she begins to suspect she may be connected to it.”

The trailer makes this one look like a comedy. Giant monsters are not funny, dang it. Unless its the Giant Claw, who looks like a puppet made by someone on drugs. The hook for Colossal is that whatever the main chick (Anne Hathaway) does, the monster mimics it. Let’s hope she doesn’t start doing kegels.

Attack of the Cyber Ocotpuses

ATTACK OF THE CYBER OCTOPUSES (Kickstarter/in-progress)
Neo-Berlin, 2079. A dark, rain-soaked city held by mega corporations where the only enjoyment in life is connecting to cyberspace and taking ‘Binary Trip,’ a cyber drug that fries your neurons but promises a feeling better than a hundred orgasms at once. In this setting, a team of crack cyberspace detectives are investigating a new menace: an army of cyber octopuses that are terrorizing the city.”

This one’s trying to crowd-fund its way into your hearts and homes as of this posting. Checking under the couch cushions for spare bitcoins. I’d donate real money, but I live in Seattle, which is built around the super wet Elliott Bay, which is teeming with our own octopuses. They’re quite friendly. Just be careful when petting them; They might act all buddy-buddy and squishy, but while they’re hugging you, one of their spare arms always goes for the wallet.

Laundry Man

LAUNDRY MAN (Available now/Amazon Prime/VOD)
Laundry Man is the story about a clumsy serial killer. It is partly based on the crimes committed by American serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer and those committed by the Belgian-Hungarian pastor, Andras Pandy.”

Watched the trailer — more splatter on the platter. The main chick appears to not be wearing a bra. As such, you’ll need permission from your parent(s) or legal guardian(s) to watch this. Wonder where they got the idea for their ad art? Seems vaguely familiar…

Carrie

Primal Rage: The Legend of Oh-Mah

PRIMAL RAGE: THE LEGEND OF OH-MAH (post-production/2017)
“A newly reunited young couple’s drive through the Pacific Northwest turns into a nightmare as they are forced to face nature, unsavory locals, and a monstrous creature known to the Native Americans as Oh-Mah.”

I live in the Pacific Northwest. How dare you call we locals unsavory? We’re loaded with savor. As for the monstrous creature Oh-Mah, never heard of him/her/it. Bigfoot/Sasquatch/Wood Ape/Harry Henderson, of course. But this other pretender to the throne should do what we tell tourists to do — buy our locally made goods and then get the truck outta here. A little rough? Nope. For us it’s quite savory.

And the Award Goes To…Godzilla!

Posted in Asian Horror, Asian Sci-Fi, Classic Horror, Foreign Horror, Giant Monsters, Godzilla, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 18, 2017 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Add an Oscar to Godzilla’s list of accomplishments. It was just announced Shin Godzilla (2016) has been nominated for Best Picture in the Japanese Academy Awards (aka, The Japan Academy Prize). Okay, so Godzilla hasn’t won it yet, but how could it not happen? For those of us lucky enough to have seen it, Shin Godzilla is the Citizen Kane (1941) of giant monster movies.

Japanese Academy Prize

Besides being the highest-grossing live-action Japanese movie of 2016, Shin Godzilla racked up a staggering 11 nominations in all: Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actor, Best Supporting Actress, Best Music, Best Cinematography, Best Art Direction, Best Lighting Direction, Best Sound Recording and Best Film Editing. They left out one: Best Poop Yer Pants Awesome Destruction and Mayhem.

Shin Godzilla

Even though the Japanese Academy Award/Prize trophy looks like a coffee table leg, it’ll sit nicely atop Godzilla’s fireplace, which just happens to be all of Tokyo.

Shin Godzilla

Unfortunately, we here in the States will have to wait until later in 2017 to get the movie on a variety of viewing platforms. I’ll no doubt buy them all. Twice.

King Kong’s Illegitimate Step-Brother

Posted in Asian Horror, Asian Sci-Fi, Classic Horror, Foreign Horror, Giant Monsters, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Scream Queens, Sharks with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 4, 2017 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

A.P.E.

There were/are a lot of titles for the 1976 South Korean King Kong rip-off, A.P.E. (I think that stands for “A Primate Enlarged.”) There’s Super Ape, King Kong Returns, King Kong eui daeyeokseup, The Great Counterattack of King-Kong, Attack of the Giant Horny Gorilla, and Hideous Mutant. I get horny gorilla, but hideous mutant? It’s a 36-foot monkey, not a result of in-breeding. Then again…

A.P.E.

Speaking of gone wrong, A.P.E. is right in the wheelhouse of campy z-grade, starting with the gorilla busting out of his Uber oil tanker, then, in the middle of the ocean (which appears to be only waist deep) battles a shark and rips it in two after much hammy splashing.

A.P.E.

The not-Kong makes it to shore and goes on a stomping spree. The military has a hard time believing the frantic calls about the brute busting a move as well as buildings. Meanwhile, Ape fights off a giant snake, kids in the park and someone out for a relaxing hang glide.

A.P.E.

Nearby a movie actress, whose boyfriend kisses her like a Grouper fish swallowing a smaller Grouper fish, is doing a forced-into-sex scene. Ape goes ape for the gal, hunts her down (grabbing her during a puppet show — don’t ask), and the rest of the movie is one long headfirst plunge down the silly slide.

A.P.E.

Not surprisingly the movie studio behind this a.r.t. was sued for big bananas due to its similarity to the also goofy King Kong remake, released in 1976 as well. But this one had Ape flipping off the military during a failed attack. Didn’t even see so much as an “up your nose with a rubber hose” in the Dino De Laurentiis version.

The Horror of 2016

Posted in Aliens, Asian Horror, Asian Sci-Fi, Evil, Fantasy, Ghosts, Giant Monsters, Godzilla, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction, Scream Queens, Sharks, TV Vixens, UFOs, Witches, Zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 25, 2016 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

The Witch

“Wouldst thou like to live deliciously?”

Best line in recent contemporary horror as whispered by the tempting, unseen evil thing in The Witch, one of the 2016’s least conventional but deliciously grim horror movies. I haven’t heard a line that good since “I know you are, but what am I?” from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure (1985).

Supergirl

The second best line of dialogue of the year comes not from a horror/sci-fi movie, but from the TV series Supergirl: “It’s time to punch you in the face…” (Note to anyone not using glitter chapstick – Supergirl is faring far better under the CW™ tweener banner than it did with CBS™, who had no idea what to do with superheroes sporting abnormally perfect teeth and Clearasil Ultra Rapid Action™ complexions. This is CW’s™ wheelhouse, man.)

In a year fraught with horror (politics notwithstanding), there were more than a few genre movie and TV stand-outs. And while I’m a world famous (ahem) blogger of horror/sci-fi, this e-offering is not even close to being comprehensive and I am by no means an authority on the subject. (I’m an expert at being NOT an expert.)

Black Phillip Cider

Of the ton of big/low-budget genre movie/TV crap I’ve watched all year long, the following represents a few chunks of interesting crap therein. You don’t have to agree with me, though, just because I’m a world famous blogger [insert nervous cough here]…

The Witch, Train To Busan, Shin Godzilla

THE WITCH
This unforgettable chiller introduced horror’s best new figurehead: Black Phillip, the Danny Trejo (or “Machete”) of badass barnyard animals.

SHIN GODZILLA
F-word amazing. They gave reboot G several insanely cool upgrades while holding true to Godzilla’s original hairstyle, including his “one-blow-blows-up-all” destructo breath: purple-y AND flame-y. That’s pretty sweet. Shin Godzilla, almost all filmed in broad daylight, shows Godzilla doing what he does best: making smash hits. I’d buy his album.

TRAIN TO BUSAN
A South Korean zombie movie that mops the floor with every other zombie movie released this year. So ridiculously intense is this thing (passengers trapped on a speeding commuter train while zombies board without passes), you don’t need English translation. (I went legit and watched it without sub-titles. That’s how I roll.)

10m Cloverfield Lane, 31, Phantasm Ravager

10 CLOVERFIELD LANE
Was this a sequel to 2008’s Cloverfield? There are those who walk among us that say yes. Doesn’t matter — while the movie climaxed with alien stuff (if you didn’t already know that — ha!), it’s the premise of several super tense characters in a rural underground survivalist bunker (two of which are there involuntarily) that brings the real horror.

ROB ZOMBIE’S 31
Like him or not, Rob Zombie always makes stomach-turning, gritty and gory horror movies. This one puts a group of traveling carnival white trash performers in a huge maze inside a huge warehouse-y type building, facing off in a brutal do-or-die obstacle course with highly colorful and pretty darn mean maniacs (Doom-Head, Sick-Head, Schizo-Head, Psycho-Head, Death-Head, Sex-Head), all wielding power tools. Make it out of the building, you live. Sort of.

PHANTASM RAVAGER
Does this final installment of the surreal and beloved Phantasm franchise deliver the groceries? Yes and not yes. Given that it’s been nearly 20 years since the last one (Phantasm IV: Oblivion/1998) and brings back the original characters, all of which puts you in the zone, Phantasm Ravager still leaves a pile of unanswered questions, like what happened to Reggie’s 1971 Plymouth Barracuda (second only to the Batmobile in sleek coolness)? But hey, those iconic flying death spheres, aka, gasoline-powered sharp things? All over the freakin’ place.

Deadpool, Captain America: Civil War, Batman V Superman, Suicide Squad, Doctor Strange

DEADPOOL / CAPTAIN AMERICA: CIVIL WAR / BATMAN V SUPERMAN: DAWN OF JUSTICE / SUICIDE SQUAD / DOCTOR STRANGE
Great year for great superhero movies. All of the above kicked ass to varying degrees of ass kicking. And Suicide Squad’s dementedly drop dead sexy Harley Quinn ranks with Deadpool and Black Phillip as a top genre icon of the year. (Godzilla’s already in the Hall of Fame, so giving somebody else a chance here.)

Harley Quinn

Honorary mention goes to Ben Affleck’s Batman, who puts the dark in Dark Knight. (He drinks the hard stuff, two syllable swears, horizontally smooches the ladies, takes pill-shaped drugs, beats people like drums then tortures/shoots them, and socks Superman right on his justice-shaped jaw. On top of that, he drives really fast and crashes into stuff. Batman gives driving lessons, not takes them.)

A few thoughts on some other this and thats…

Arrival, The Shallows, Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them

ARRIVAL
Not just a good movie, but a great UFO movie that doesn’t rely on all out paranoid military warfare on our space brothers, who look a heckuva lot like seafood appetizers. P.S. to the Internet: I’ve seen nearly every UFO video on YouTube™ and they’re starting to look fake. I’m beginning to think UFOs aren’t real. But that’s probably just crazy talk.

THE SHALLOWS
You can still be the most heavy metal, human-gulping shark with extra teeth in the ocean, but you still take second seat to Blake Lively’s seat in a string bikini worn throughout the ENTIRE MOVIE.

FANTASTIC BEASTS AND WHERE TO FIND THEM
An enthralling movie set in 1920s New York with wizards and a menagerie of off-the-hook mythical creatures and monsters, the likes of which have not been seen since the last WWE pay-per-view. Y’know, I bet Harry Potter fans might like this.

Miss Peregrine’s Home For Peculiar Children, The Boy, Morgan

MISS PEREGRINE’S HOME FOR PECULIAR CHILDREN
In my day a home for peculiar children was called “summer camp.” A bunch of mutation kids with unique abilities: floating, projecting movies through eyes, starting fires by touching stuff, super strength, control of nature, and my fav, eating through a mouth on the back of your head. You could take down a Frisko Freeze™ double deluxe burger in one mouth while sucking down a chocolate shake with the other. I wouldst like to live deliciously.

THE BOY
Featured The Walking Dead’s walking gorgeous Lauren Cohan. I wasn’t aware of anything else in the movie. I think it had some sort of boy in it. I think he was a puppet, which is just plain weird.

MORGAN
A genetic experiment gone wrong — or right, depending on where you stand on a contemporary updating of Frankenstein (1931).

Independence Day: Resurgence, X-Men: Apocalypse, Star Trek Beyond

There were a few genre misfires this year, though, including Independence Day: Resurgence, (we need to issue a formal apology to extraterrestrials), X-Men: Apocalypse (yeesh, what a mutant mess) and Star Trek Beyond, which relied more on blowing up things than the story line. Speaking of, why do they have to keep exploding the USS Enterprise over and over? Man, I wanted to drive that thing.

Wonder Woman

So what do we have to look forward to from here? According to IMDB.com there’s approximately 1,000+ horror/sci-fi/fantasy/superhero movies (Wonder Woman – I await you) slated for release in 2017. Butt — meet couch. Like Doctor Strange, I’m looking through space and time (and Collider.com) for Pacific Rim: Uprising (2018), Godzilla, King of Monsters (2019) and Godzilla vs. King Kong (hopefully before I croak). All the other stuff watched is what I’ll do to pass time/pass gas/pass out until those movies come to enrich my life.

Spend Christmas With Godzilla

Posted in Asian Horror, Asian Sci-Fi, Classic Horror, Foreign Horror, Giant Monsters, Godzilla, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 17, 2016 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Kaiju Christmas Marathon

The awesomely awesome El Rey™ channel must’ve got a hold of my Christmas wish list. Their 3rd Annual Kaiju Christmas Godzilla movie marathon begins on Friday, December 23, 2016 and spans four days and 20 G-movies — over 96 hours. Could there possibly be a better way to celebrate the holidays? I think not.

Godzilla movies

The marathon begins with Gojira (1954) and crushes it from there. The timing is perfect — Godzilla: King of Monsters was announced as the official title of the next movie, scheduled for 2018/2019. Wish they could hurry up the release date to an hour from now. (Right after I have breakfast, basically.)

Gojira / Shin Godzilla

And for those who haven’t seen Shin Godzilla (2016), what is wrong with you? Just kidding — it had a small theatrical run, so you can be kinda excused for missing it. Unfortunately, no word on a U.S. DVD release date. But when it does come out, you won’t be able to play your song and dance card.

Godzilla Christmas

Don’t have the awesomely awesome El Rey™ channel but want to know how to get it? Want the full Godzilla movie line-up and start times? Click HERE to see what you’re getting for Christmas.

Godzillas

$40,000 Godzilla

Posted in Asian Horror, Asian Sci-Fi, Classic Horror, Fantasy, Foreign Horror, Giant Monsters, Godzilla, Nature Gone Wild, Science Fiction with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 27, 2016 by Drinkin' & Drive-in

Godzilla

Have you ever wanted something so badly you’re willing to publicly down-on-your-knees beg for it. (NOT counting beer – I’ve been doing that for years.) I’m talking about owning my very own 6-foot tall Godzilla statue by Bandai, licensor of all things kaiju.

Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah

From the press release…

“A rare human-size Godzilla figure to tower over your life…”

“A random drawing decides which 10 fans get the chance to own this 3D-printed Godzilla statue (based on the design from the 1991 film Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah), which costs approximately $43,500.00.”

Godzilla

“Only 10 of these Design Coco™ 3D-printed statues will be made, with the chance to buy the giant Godzilla assigned through a random drawing. Bandai will take applications for the drawing on its Premium Bandai™ website starting November 7, 2016.”

Godzilla

$40,000+ big ones for the Big Guy might cause some among us to spazz out. But I recall a solid gold Godzilla statue about 14 inches tall sold for $1.5 million fun coupons back in 2014. Unfortunately, I was not able to buy it, even with a post-dated check. (Geez – I had proper I.D.)

Cold Hard Cash

So I have GOT to have this Godzilla statue. Anybody got a spare $43,500.00 laying around I could borrow? I have lots of post-dated checks already filled out…