Seasonal Sorcerer

Season of the Witch

During the days of the Black Plague™, two knights who kill in the name of THE LORD, get fed up doing all of God’s work and go AWOL from the army.

Season of the Witch

They’re later captured and given a choice — transport a young girl who is suspected of being a witch and causing the Black Plague™ to a monastery way the hell out there, or get a super sharp sword stuck up your butt. Easy choice.

Season of the Witch

Along the perilous journey that has several members of their entourage being eaten alive by werewolves (wild dogs, but werewolves made about as much sense as knights with capped teeth), they discover the girl is indeed a denizen of darkness.

Season of the Witch

To rub their faces in it, this was all a set up to deliver this w*tch b*tch to the church where she can transform into a winged bat devil and unleash more of the same. Unfortunately, the ensuing winged bat devils are cheap digital animations and ruin any belief system based on good or evil.

Season of the Witch

The twist at the end of the ham-fisted Season of the Witch (2011) is that it all verily stunketh.

Season of the Witch

P.S. You’ll be tempted, but try not confuse this movie with the same-titled Season of the Witch made in 1973 by zombie-advocate, George A. Romero. (The “A” stands for Andrew.)

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