The Devil Wears Cut-Offs

The unfortunately low-budgeted Hell’s Highway (2002) begins with a sexy-yet-evil hitchhiker chick thumbing a ride on a hellishly hot Arizona highway that’s paved with wrongness. This is indicated by pointy cactus and various crooked crosses made out of bunk bed slats.

A carload of festive guys ’n gals stop to pick up the hitchin’ vixen, unaware that she just ate the brains of the last person who gave her a lift. Noting her distinct evilness (warped conversation, a brandished gun pointed towards uneaten brains), the travelers dump the chick on the side of the road. So how the double heck did she end up miles down the road later — in front of the car she was voted out of?

Through a series of plot-stalling events, the hitchhiker is killed. Several times. A minor inconvenience, she keeps coming back despite the fact her high-riding cut-off-encased booty has been dragged behind a car, stabbed, shoveled and chainsawed. Hats off for the scene where her head makes like a Gallagher watermelon when backed over by a car.

The evil chick is cute, but not particularly convincing as an unholy b*tch demon hell bent on road rage revenge. Some topless action, a smattering of gutter talk, a nice cameo by porn, uh, giant Ron Jeremy, and gore slung high and low. A solid return on your horror video investment dollar.

P.S. Hopefully you won’t confuse this Hell’s Highway with 1932’s Hell’s Highway. That one features chain gang prisoners and rioting. As far as I can tell, there are no unkillable demon chicks or porn stars in that one. Be cool if there were.