Bubblegum and Aliens

Mars Attacks!

Mars Attacks! (1996) is a comic sci-fi take on those old Mars Attacks! bubblegum cards of the early ’60s. The cards were cool, the gum, not so much. (I can blame my dental work on that tooth-chipping candy.)

Mars Attacks!

Thousands of green, bug-eyed Martians arrive in flying saucers, looking to annihilate all living junk on Earth. Once the aliens are deemed hostile (rays guns disintegrating your flesh like flash paper), the world hits the panic button.

Mars Attacks!

You can kill the duck quacking brain creatures and make their heads pop like a puberty zit, but it’s kinda tough. Our last line of defense – Slim Whitman music, which does to the Martians what microwave ovens do to Jell-O™.

Mars Attacks!

Starring everyone in Hollywood, this mildly entertaining invasion fest even has a cameo with Godzilla. It gets better with the addition of tight pants lounge icon Tom Jones, who, when you think about it, is the Las Vegas answer to Godzilla.

Speaking of Vegas, the place gets creamed by the aliens. Good – I lost three month’s rent at the tables. Now I know why they call it craps.

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