Cave Man – Cradle To The Grave, Man

The X-Species

A new one about man being at the bottom of the food chain while an “as yet undocumented by science or someone playing a scientist” creature slaps on the feed bag and goes to town on a big dripping slab of buttsteak.

Arriving sometime in 2015, The X-Species is shot in regular style filming, POV and found footage. Not a fan of the last two. (Found footage is the karaoke of filmmaking.) If you agree then we’ll both have to suck it up and see what the new species of apex predator is all about.

Here’s the less-than-sizzling press release: “An archaeological expedition uncovers a prehistoric hominid burial site. When their team is unexpectedly attacked they are forced to take refuge in the catacombs of an unmapped cave. One by one they fall to an ancient predator.”

The X-Species

The trailer indicates the beast is of the two-legged variety and is much taller than whatever it kill eats. Think Sasquatch as a basketball center. His pre-kill eat growl sounds like a gurgling hungry stomach, only louder, as if it swallowed a microphone.

I’m sure The X-Species is at least worth 90 minutes of couch time, but I’m hoping this isn’t just another “throw a bunch of people into an unfamiliar territory and a monster picks ’em off over a soundtrack of screaming and bleeding” borefest. Not that I’m against such things, it’s just that I’ve seen all 152 times before. [Newbies: Start with Area 407 (2012) and rewind from there.]

Area 407

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