Hindi Horror

Agyaat: The Unknown (2009). Should be called Agyaat: The Unendurable. An India-made “horror” movie with choreographed dance sequences and sing-alongs. Kill me now.

A film crew goes into a lush Sri Lanka forest to film people dancing and singing. (Oh, Sasquatch – why have you forsaken us?) While a camera is being repaired (it broke itself because it couldn’t put up with what it was being asked to do), the cast wanders off into the woods. It’s here (or there) they encounter an unseen something that threatens to rip up their mall-purchased clothes and product-styled hair.

Though you never get to see what it is that’s after them, you can make an educated guess: it’s a film critic, ready to tear them a new gadhē. Oh wait, it was me all along. Cool!