Wolf, Man

Wolfman

After his dad is stabbed with a silver dagger by his own stinkin’ cousins, Colin Glasgow returns home from traveling the world to inherit the family fortune. Every cloud has a silver lining. The inheritance’s only condition is Colin has to stay in the Glasgow Manor for 30 days. In werewolf speak, until the next full moon.

Wolfman

Seems his family was cursed by a satanic cult, which turned his dad – and soon himself – into some sort of a man dog. When Colin finally does wolf up, he looks as though he rubbed his face with a Gluestick™ and dunked his head in a bucket of barber clippings.

Wolfman

Colin spends the next hour running around and killing people with his shirt buttoned all the way up to his neck, probably because they didn’t have enough stunt hair to cover his chest. Colin’s attacks aren’t that inspired, either, as he just does the “I’ll choke you!” thing on everyone.

Wolfman

Had the ancient dagger in my pocket been real silver and not plastic, I could’ve spared myself the agony of watching Wolfman (1979), which took me until just yesterday to get through since I started watching it in 1979.

3 Responses to “Wolf, Man”

  1. 1979-2014? Wow! That is only slightly longer than a marathon viewing of the Lord of the Rings, Ultra Wide-Screen Edition, Extended Directors Cut With Restored Lost Scenes, Remastered Misplaced Scenes and Frilly Pink Borders! Some movie!
    I think I saw the original Theatrical release (drive-in edition) and it was way shorter. But it still dragged on and on.
    But it is still the best movie ever filmed in the Scottish Highlands of Shelby, North Carolina.

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