Rat Monkey Vampires

Don't Be Afraid of the Dark

Spooky Blackwood Manor, an architect’s dream reach-around, has rat monkey vampire creatures that live in the caverns beneath the dark historied mansion. These little gremlins eat teeth, which confuses the enamel outta me. What do they use to chew with? Major plot discrepancy.

Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark

A divorced architect and his similar-careered girlfriend are restoring Blackwood Manor. Lots of rooms to feel each other up in – until the guy’s nine year-old daughter is foisted off on them. The little handful is so moody as to be classified emo. But the creatures who can talk (again, if you eat teeth, what do you use to talk with?), get in her head and persuade her to release them from their unholy hole.

Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark

Of course dad and his upgrade don’t believe her. When they finally do, it’s too late. And by too late, I mean for you for waiting and waiting for something scary to happen. Aside from a very painful death at the very end for one of the major players, Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark (2011) goes in the “don’t be afraid of not wasting your money” category.

Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark

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