Heavy Metal Godzilla

Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla II

Harvesting spare parts from Mecha-King Ghidorah in hopes the technology the Futurians turned them onto will permanently smack Godzilla, Japan Self Defense Forces salvage the three-headed junk heap from the bottom of the ocean and construct a badass version of MechaGodzilla. Let’s hear it for run-on sentences.

Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla II

They gotta do something – Godzilla’s been laughing, yes laughing, at years long attempts to do him in. He’s even blogged about it. But while those guys are working on new add-on weapons, a team of explorers finds several Volkswagon-sized prehistoric eggs on an island. Omelettes for all. Oh, crap – one of the eggs has hatched and a new version of Rodan (he’s red this time as opposed to his green casual wear) is flying around, causing migraines and destruction. (This model is referred to as Fire Rodan and pronounced “ray-don.” I wish they’d get their linguistics straight.)

Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla II

But what the explorers don’t know is that the other unhatched egg is Godzilla’s latest rug rat. This is odd as they refer to Godzilla as daddy. Pick a lane and drive in it – does Godzilla going around knocking up Broadzillas, or is he/she one him/her self?

Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla II

MechaGodzilla wasn’t prepared for this scenario and, in a mind-blowing battle, falls to the champ. Now all Godzilla has to do is grab his kid and go for a long walk into the ocean. Only thing left to do is find a junk yard big enough to dump MechaGodzilla.

Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla II

Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla II (1993) succeeds where other G-movies sometimes don’t quite step up when it comes to the battle scenes. These chaotic sequences are violent, brutal, explosive and devastating – much like my latest proctology exam, but with way less crying.

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