Godzilla Dies

Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah

Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah (1995) is the movie where Godzilla actually dies. Yeah, Godzilla kicked the bucket in his very first movie. That didn’t count, because in that one he was murdered. No one kills Godzilla in this movie – he kills himself!

Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah

His digestive system a virtual nuclear reactor, Godzilla’s core is heating up at an accelerated rate and radiation is literally eating him from the inside out. Hence, the steaming and glowing red sores all over his shirt. (Note: The steaming could very well be the after affects of eating refried fleeing citizens.)

Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah

This monolithic meltdown poses a serious problem for Tokyo – when Godzilla goes, everybody goes. G is already past the point of eruption, which will burn a hole to the center of the Earth, thereby annihilating all of this over-priced planet and its handy convenience stores.

Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah

With that on their plate, the about-to-be-dry-roasted city has to deal with deadly life-forms that’ve been brewing in the ocean every since Dr. Serizawa invented the Oxygen Destroyer™ and murdered Godzilla back in 1954.

Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah

These life-forms mutate faster than my beer gut into the monolithic Destoroyah (American pronunciation: Destroyer), one of the coolest/biggest/badassiest G monsters in the cupboard. He’s a bit on the unmanageable side, turning buildings into gravel chunks, sprouting city-wide bat wings and sporting numerous mouthy fangs the size of God’s pocketknife. There’s no way this can end good.

The spiritually epic finale will make you cry. I cried. It’s just not fair to keep piling all this sh*t on Godzilla. How would you like it?

One Response to “Godzilla Dies”

  1. anonymous Says:

    Oh no, poor Godzilla! Even though I don’t hate the Destroyer, I wish that he didn’t kill the Big G.

    But you know? I’d rather have the Destroyer be turned into another monster whom I’d call the Defender and have him become a friend of Godzilla.

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