4th Dimensional Pants

The 4D Man

4D Man (1959) is also known as The Master of Terror. Am I the only one on the internet who thinks The Master of Terror was thought up by someone who only owns striped shirts?

So these two brothers are scientists. One is a jackass whose early experiments in amplifying molecular structure burns down his lab and the building it was in. The landlord cares not for science and is NOT happy. The other brother, the unacknowledged inventor of Cargonite, a substance so impenetrable, nothing can pass through it. Except Superman.

The 4D Man

Tony Nelson, the younger brother, insists that his invention can render Cargonite as weak as wet toilet paper. He even has proof: a pencil stuck halfway between a block of lead. I totally want one of those.

Upset because his boss won’t give him credit for the Cargonite and losing his sweet trim to younger brother, Scott Nelson goes into the lab at night and tries the machine on for size. It works – his hand goes right into a piece of lead. One can almost see the practicable applications of having one’s fingers stuck in metal.

The 4D Man

But the experiment yields a unique side effect – Scott is able to reach into mailboxes and pull out your drunk letters to your ex. He can also stick his lead-free hand into a grocery store window and steal an apple. And thus a life of hardcore crime begins.

The 4D Man

The other two side effects aren’t as cool. When he touches someone and his hand goes into them, birthdays go flying by and they die of old age within seconds. That’s not an exclusive condition – each time Scott uses his 4D ability, he begins aging as well.

The 4D Man

As his mind starts going into 5D, Scott walks through a bank vault and makes a large withdrawal. The cops, armed with machine guns (!) attempt to “apprehend” Scott. “Nothing can hold me,” he enunciates loudly, not a jail cell, nor brick handcuffs. Nothing, that is, except…Cargonite. Man, that’s some bad karma irony right there.

Final notes: The plot is cool but the dialogue is lame; Tony stumbles over his lines when he gets excited, which is every other minute. Secondly, the soundtrack is some rhythmic jazz thing with bongos, no doubt played by beatniks. Beatniks are like hippies, except they can read sheet music.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: