Cannibal Diner

Cannibal DinerWouldn’t it be totally funny if you went to a diner run by cannibals, opened the menu, and saw yourself listed in Entrees? Man, that’d be a knee-slapper. More so if you saw that your braised butt beef is being served with a baked potato, a small dinner salad and seasonal vegetables. Everybody knows butt beef is traditionally served with sweet potato fries and a fruit compote. Man, I’m still chuckling.

Did you know there’s a real Cannibal Diner? Yep, it’s a German horror movie releasing in the Motherland soon, and then the rest of the world at the end of 2012. Or beginning of 2013. It’s gotta get past Standards and Practices first. And given the subject matter, the FDA as well. Heh.

Cannibal DinerIn Cannibal Diner a bunch of chick supermodels go into the woods to party and are attacked by cannibals, who take them to an old factory where they will be eaten. Is that even a plot?

Blood DinerIf that sounds like a short joke, might I suggest Blood Diner (1987), an alternate choice cannibal movie with a little more to chew on. Two brothers own a rundown restaurant. They need a special dish to get customers rolling in, so they kill an assortment of young women to use their fleshy parts as the main ingredient in the hot plate of the day. That, and they need blood sacrifices to awaken a dormant Egyptian goddess. Two for one.

Still not flavorful enough for you? Then go to The Encyclopedia of Cannibal Movies [click HERE]; If you can’t find a cannibal flick to suit your taste, then you have no taste at all. Vegan.

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