Not Enough Evidence To Support Evidence

EvidenceI love it how movie studios/filmmakers rush to tell you how great their movie is before it even comes out. Everything from getting your friends with silly blogs (ahem) and industry insiders to toss out quotes like “It’ll scare the sh*t outta your orifice,” those who make movies do this to flag your attention as if needing help to change a flat tire.

Take Evidence, a new found footage horror movie about four young adults who venture into the canyons around Los Angeles, only to find they are being stalked by a mysterious creature. Those who made it with hand-held cameras and some friends who can scream on cue and only occasionally chump a line, are self-proclaiming Evidence to be “the highest concept found-footage movie of all time.” Just a sec – gotta finish yawning.

Mind you, I’m not trying to rain on their parade (or as my grandfather used to say, “pee on your bald head”). But that kind of pretentious hype (“…of all time” – gimme a break) is very off-putting and presumes its intended audience is dense enough to take the bait. The again, after watching and reviewing over 3,207 horror, sci-fi and fantasy movies (that’s not hype; I can prove it – just ask my mom), I’m admittedly more than a bit cynical.

Blair Witch Rip-offOf all the annoying trends in filmmaking these days (besides zombies) is the “found footage” genre. And that’s all thanks to that wretched Blair Witch Project (1999) raccoon excrement, which was made for $1.50 and went on to sucker the public out of one billion dollars. The consumer-grade camera/“found footage” gold rush was on – and we’re still paying for it over 13 years later. Yes, there have been found footage flicks that actually use the medium to mind-boggling effect (Cloverfield, [REC], my proctology exam), but for the most part, the no-talent get-rich-quick crowd racing to cash-in.

EvidenceMy fondest wish in life (besides to hang out with Batman) is that Evidence becomes massively successful. Heck, I’ll even pay to see it, not because I’m intrigued to see what the filmmakers are able to do on a cafeteria budget or that it lives up to their claim of “the highest concept found-footage movie of all time.” I just wanna see the monster. And maybe a few boobies thrown in for plot balance and structure. But to see it for the hype? Not so much.

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