Vacationing Zombies

Zombie DriftwoodFinally, a new spin on the Bermuda Triangle, that spooky place in the western part of the North Atlantic Ocean where ships and airplanes disappear without a trace and where giant sea monsters prosper and flourish. In the British undead comedy Zombie Driftwood (released in the UK last year, but not here yet), a cruise ship paddles into the Bermuda Triangle, vanishes, then re-appears off the coast of Grand Cayman where loud and drunk vacationing American tourists annually make asses of themselves.

Zombie DriftwoodHere’s the twist – after emerging from the cursed waters, all the passengers are now face-eating zombies. Forget Vegas – time to book a one-way trip to the BT.

And it just gets better. Battling the zombies are two heavy metal fans who take on the boatload of brain-chewers, fortified with the restorative power of booze. And there’s a machete thrown in because a machete makes sense in the hands of a metal fan, though a mace or some kind of ornate sword would be acceptable as well.

Zombie DriftwoodRock Express, a hard rock and metal merch shopping site, calls Zombie Driftwood, “the funniest zombie movie since Shaun of the Dead.” Hey Rock Express – have you heard of Zombieland (2009), that little undead comedy that was made for $23.9 million and grossed over $102 million? (By contrast, Shaun of the Dead/2004 was made for $5 million and made $30 million.)

Zombie DriftwoodI listen to heavy metal and drink sweet refreshing booze. All I need is a ticket to the Cayman Islands, a valid passport that doesn’t have Ozzy Osbourne’s picture taped over mine, and a machete/mace/ornate sword, and my vacation is ready to go. FYI: screw sunblock – that sounds more like a rule than a sensible preventative step. I don’t do rules, man.

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