Ghost In The Flying Machine

Dark Flight 3DIt’s bad enough when airports use Superman technology to look into your underpants before boarding a doomed flight. But to actually travel on a ghost plane? I can put up with an X-rayed wee wee and even airport security intercepting beer smuggled inside a squeezable bottle of Massengil™, but not polter-pilots. Billed as Thailand’s first 3D horror movie, Dark Flight 3D puts you in the cockpit of SPOOKY ASS STUFF and coach-class ghosts.

Ten years ago, which is about a decade, give or take, a supermodel airline hostess (or “peanut lady”) survived a horrific plane crash. (No peanuts made it out alive.) And like all pre-screened employees of the airline, she logically believes that vengeful spirits (or “ghosts”) landed the plane into pieces. So gooned out was this gal, she had to undergo a decade (or 10 years, give or take) of psycho therapy to get the wrinkles ironed out of her belief system.

Done and done. Now she’s ready to take flight once again and…hold it Mable, don’t set the table – the plane she’s on is the SAME ONE that crashed all those electro-shock treatments ago. Not to worry, the aircraft has been fixed and re-painted, with hardly a trace of blood and gut splatter anywhere. How ironic is it, then, that the same ghosts booked seats on that flight? The odds are so astronomical as to be comical. Hey, that rhymes! I’m in the zone today.

The Ghost of Flight 401Any of this sound familiar? It should – Dark Flight 3D uses The Ghost of Flight 401 (1978) as its template for terror. Based on a true event (Wikipedia™: “Eastern Air Lines Flight 401 was a Lockheed L-1011 Tristar 1 jet that crashed into the Florida Everglades on the night of December 29, 1972, causing 101 fatalities”), The Ghost of Flight 401 (book and movie) has engineers sifting through the doomed plane’s salvageable parts and uses them to repair other aircraft. Not cool, air dudes. Soon passengers and crew on those aircraft report seeing what they believe to be the ghost of the wrecked airplane’s flight engineer.

I believe them with all my heart.

The Ghost of Flight 401So the next time you book a flight, choose one that doesn’t have ghosts, vengeful or otherwise. Knowing airlines these days, they’ll charge you extra for that.

4 Responses to “Ghost In The Flying Machine”

  1. I recently got hold of the movie of Flight 401. Its just sitting there waiting for me to watch it

  2. I left some used toilet paper behind the potty on that flight

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