Thong of the Dead

Zomb'asians: Thong of the DeadA bunch of Asian zombie girls in micro-bikinis come out of the ocean. You don’t notice that they’re zombies because you’re staring at how well their eyeliner doesn’t run, even after hours of being in the water. Then long icky tongues shoots out of their mouths and slices your head off. But your head is not dead, and you’re still able to talk. So what does an undead head say? In the new upcoming indie comedy horror movie Zomb’asians: Thongs of the Dead (coming in Triple D), nothing too cerebral.

Horny teenagers are trapped on a cursed island inhabited by the aforementioned Zomb’asian bikini’d creatures. Where things get a bit hard to believe is when they take refuge in a temple run by a Taoist monk and his supermodel daughter skilled in the ways of kung-fu. The girls who are part of the beleaguered group are captured by a zombie queen and their internal juices sucked out so that the queen may sustain her perpetual existence. Sure, it’s a flawed business model, but one that works.

Zomb'asians: Thong of the DeadWhat to expect when Zomb’asians: Thongs of the Dead is released: girls in bikinis, knuckle-headed comedy and CGI special effects that wouldn’t make the grade in a video game. Don’t let any of that stop you from seeing it. No one said they were trying to re-imagineer Shakespeare.

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